In the United States of America, we have what we perceive to be an expectation of a normal relationship.
Allow me to explain:
It is normal to expect that a man and a woman are close to the same age.
It is normal to expect that a divorced man is an adulterer, or a drunk, an emotional abuser, lazy, etc.
It is normal to assume that a Christian marriage is a partnership, 50/50.
It is normal to assume that both the woman and the man will have most things in common in order to make the relationship "easier."
It is normal to assume that there are many fish in the sea, so just choose one, and if that doesn't, work out, throw that fish back in and display your wares, and catch another.
Well, if one dares to read the word of God, we find that "Normal" thinking in the United States is far from Godly instruction when it comes to marriage.
Think about it for a moment: Adam took time to name ALL the animals, and only then did the Heavenly Father put him to sleep and take a rib to make Eve. ADAM was older than EVE. For most of Human history, an older man was considered a wise choice by women for security and maturity.
Boaz, was arguably older than Ruth, due to his wealth, and his status.
But today, in America, Christian women want a man very young, and of course a hunk! Who is super spiritual. But super spiritual comes with experience and "TIME."
No where in the bible does it tell a woman to get a Masters degree and become self sufficient and not need a man. In fact, in many places it counsels a woman to "Be keepers at home." It is worldly to suggest that a career comes first, then husband and children when all is secure. In fact, I argue that it is a lack of faith that God can send a woman a good man, who is a provider. Nothing wrong with an education, as long as education and career doesn't' leave the children in day care, and the husband fixing is own meals night after night.
Now concerning Divorce, I can only speak of my experience. I married a pastors daughter. She committed adultery and abused/neglected the children, and other thinks that I will not go into. It was very hard for me to deal with this reality. Now lets make it worse. I naturally went looking for a good wife and mother for these boys. I was deceived by a Russian woman who PRETENDED to be a Christian, and used me to gain entrance into the United States. In actuality, she was a drunk, and wanted nothing to do with Christianity. She refused to live with me, and after much council I finally had to divorce her due to her adultery. Now here's my question:
Am I one with a scarlet letter of "D"?
Have I sinned? Am I to be shunned by a Godly Christian woman?
What do you think? I would like to hear from some Christian women on this subject.
I believe the bible when it tells me to love my wife as Christ loves the church. I believe the bible when it says a wife should obey her husband. The husband must give account of his spiritual leadership and the judgment seat of Christ, but the wife will answer for her following her Godly Husband. It is not 50/50. That is a worldly philosophy straight of the HELL.
Do I sound hard nosed? Do I not sound like I can be loving and romantic? The you don't know me, for I am saving my love for the one that was made for me, to complete me, and I will love her more than the moon loves the stars! She will be the mother of my children and the Song of Solomon was written just for her!
Behold thou art fair my love, behold thou are fair! thou hast doves eyes with thy locks.....
Why are you bothered what people on a dating site think. Most are here to fulfil their own needs and will answer according to their position in life.
Perhaps you need to be more discerning rather than merely ticking boxes as deceivers will be all too happy to tell you what you want to hear. Nobody is perfect and you won't find perfection but you have God's word to guide you. If you follow that long enough you will be guided to where God wants you.
It may be that some of us are destined to be single and occasionally interact with people in a way that is positive by being the example of Christ that we should be striving to be. Just because we meet people and don't always fall in love does not make it a bad thing. Forcing something that is not mean't to be opens the door to sin on both sides.
I wanted to thank you for reading my post and responding!:dancingp: I see you are from the Philippines. I think that it is neat that we Christian men and women can write each other all over the world! You have a wonderful blessed day and may you find your soul mate, the one God made just for you!:applause:
I want to reply to you concerning : A Normal Relationship.
First of all, let me start by saying that God did not intend for marriage relationship to be difficult, but people try to complicate it by not finding their place in it.
What is the norm of everything? The Bible, that is the mirror we see ourselves clearly.
Basically for every human problem there is a solution in the Word of God. It is the treasure that contains everything we will ever need in our Christian walk.
It reveals the Truth to every subject we need in life.
The human mind can not comprehend the Wisdom of God, we just have to accept the Truth that God has revealed to us in the Bible.
Concerning marriage, God describes it like a hierarchy: first the man is the head of the house, and the women comes after him, then the children.
There is nothing wrong with that. It was designed to work like that. If not then, the relationship will not be stable.
If God put it this way, then that is the best way, because He knows better.
If He said so then that is the way that leads to a successful marriage.
But he also says: You husbands love your wives, just as Christ loved the church.
Wives submit to your husbands, as to the Lord...
When both partners have a heart full of love, compassion, devotion, joy,commitment... then they can share that love with one another.
If this kind of love is missing and they do not know themselves and have a poor self image, they will not know how to love, appreciate and support the other person.
First they need to be fed in the source of Love, get rid of all negative emotions which are obstacles and ask God to help them grow emotionally.
When you know who you are in Christ and know what you want, you can only succeed.
There is no point to fear, when God says you can have a happy marriage relationship.
Personally I do not believe in defeat, but in victory and success.
That is what I believe and God says in His Word: As a man thinketh in his heart so is he. Prov 23 :7.
If you believe in a happy and healthy marriage relationship that is what you will get. What you believe, that is what you achieve.
The human mind is limited, but the Wisdom of God is infinite and we can only benefit from His Word if we are willing to apply the Truth in our lives.
When there is commitment from both partners, things will work smoothly and God will provide for all their needs.
We read in the Bible that God is Love and we need to submit ourselves to this Love to teach us how to love and be happy.
You can go to the website of Keith Moore Ministries and listen to his sermons, if you are interested.
I will keep you in my prayers and I am sure very soon your answer will come.
Sorry to hear about what you had experienced. I do believe that everything happen for a reason. And God has a reason for it. no one can explain on why you have to experience it or on why you have to suffer it but the ways of the Lord is beyond our comprehension. You may not know now but in the future and his perfect time, you will realize it. Just continue to trust in the Lord,anyway, He knows you more than the people around you or the people whom you will be encountering in the future. If you delight yourself in Him, surely, He will give the desires of your heart.
May the wisdom of the Lord be with you as you continue in your journey seeking for the real happiness in your life. For sure, God has best plans for you. He makes everything beautiful in His time.
all girl want to be a special so if your close to the other girl make sure your special someone can be close to them too not being jealous your special someone to any girls
