I hadn't been back on this dating site for about a year...until a few days ago. If you look at my profile, don't believe a single word of what I said...because during the past year, I have permanently turned my back on God, Jesus, and the bible! I don't believe any of it anymore...simply because of a failed promise found in scripture. The promise is found in more than one book of the bible...so as far as witnesses are concerned, I've got at least 2 witnesses for those of you who need proof that Jesus said it. Anyway here's what happened:
I asked God to provide me with a wife back in June of 2009...and believed when I prayed that I would receive what I asked. Well, here it is 3 years later and still no wife. The provision was never provided even though I know with absolute certainty that I believed!!! The young lady who did happen to come across my path led me on for nearly a year before ending the relationship over something that never should've been an issue. The emotional pain that resulted was like someone stuck a sword right through my chest...and the anger and rage inside my heart has been building ever since...and I refuse to contain it any longer! For those of you who might happen to think I should've given God more time, let me explain something to you once and for all:
A truly holy, all knowing, and all powerful God doesn't need 3 years or more to provide a suitable wife for me...especially considering that he would know exactly which young lady would be a perfect match for me...and could easily have brought her and I together.
By the way, I was going to look up the verses in the bible to make it easier for everyone to find them, but I'm already angry enough...so you'll just have to look them up yourselves.
I know many of you aren't going to like what I've said here...but I can't help that. Just being honest, I never in all my life thought that it would ever come down to this!
I'm really sorry you are hurting so much, and I'm really sorry that you have turned your back on God. God does promise to answer our prayers, but sometimes the answer is not what we want. He's not a machine into which we can put a prayer and receive the answer we choose. The apostle Paul believed that God could remove his "thorn in the flesh"...and he begged God to do so. God said that His grace was sufficient for Paul, though, and did not remove the affliction. Do I think that Paul just didn't believe hard enough? Of course not! If anyone could believe hard enough, it would have been Paul!
I started praying really hard for a husband in 2002...right about the time one of my closest friends got married at the age of 19. 3 years later, I redoubled my prayer efforts, when another very close friend got married the day after her 20th birthday. I believed that if I prayed hard enough, long enough, passionately enough, and with faith enough, God would grant my request. It's been 10 years since I started begging God for a husband; I'm 29 now, and it seems that all of my friends have left me behind. They are married, have children, etc. There have been many times when I shook my fist at God and asked Him why He didn't answer my prayers with a "yes." He could have. But his answer was either "no" or "wait."
Sure, I've dated a couple times. One guy lead me to believe that he intended to marry we, but he shattered those dreams when he suddenly decided that our relationship "wasn't working for him." Another guy stole my heart with his sweet words, but then made it very clear that he wasn't really interested in dating me. I'm seeing someone right now who seems to be really great...but even after 5 months I don't know if this relationship will last. It has great potential, but so did the others.
You aren't alone in your struggles. Obviously, many of us on this site are looking for a spouse as well. And if it were easy for us, or if God had already answered our prayers with a "yes," we would not be on this site.
I would encourage you to shake your fist at God. Tell Him your disappointments. Unload all your frustration on Him. He has big shoulders; He can handle it. It's OK to ask "why?" But don't blaspheme Him. Don't accuse Him of being incapable of answering your prayers. And then, I would encourage you to seek out alternate promises in the Bible. Promises that God knows what's best for you, that He won't leave your or forsake you, that He already has plans for you, and that He loves you. Claim those promises. When the old demons of doubt and anger and hurt try to come and pull you away, resist. And give God a chance to show you that He's really there...whether He answers your prayers the way you want Him to or not.
Just to clear up a few things, I know myself better than anyone else on this planet. I happen to be among the 25 percent of guys who need the woman to make the first move...and God would've known that. Also, I've never slept with anyone...so I still have my purity in that sense...which means that I'm unwilling to accept any woman who has lost her purity in that manner. I know that statement may seem a bit harsh to those who happen to have lost their purity by making foolish decisions...but I still have my purity (and I still intend to keep it that way). So yes, I would say God had a bit of a tall order on his hands in my case...however, for an all knowing and all powerful God, it still should've been a very simple task. It would be different if I had been asking for a wife without having good intentions...but I was asking for a wife who would support me in being a servant of God. That's why I have no intentions of turning back...because I know what was "on the table" on my end of the situation. Time is precious...and God has taken too long. If God hadn't taken so long, my faith never would've and never could've been crashed. As far as I'm concerned, God destroyed his own purpose within my life through negligence.
"WillBDunne", It's not like I commanded anything...I simply asked for what I needed in a peaceful manner. By the way..."stony ground"...seriously??? You don't even know me or my background. Both of my parents were (and still are) Christians and had an understanding of scripture...and both came from Christian backgrounds...and both were an influence on my life...as well as my brother and sister, and most of my relatives. This isn't a matter of "stony ground"...it's a matter of a failed promise! As I said the other day, I never thought it would ever come down to this. So, hopefully this information will give a better understanding of my situation.
"Quadrafire", Not long after that young lady ended the relationship, she told my sister-in-law that God wanted me to have a wife. So, "Quadrafire", if it's proof you needed as to God's will or the timing, well, now you have it.
The way I see it, God has already had more than enough time to provide another young lady to be my wife...that's what led to my decision.
"Time is precious...and God has taken too long. If God hadn't taken so long, my faith never would've and never could've been crashed. As far as I'm concerned, God destroyed his own purpose within my life through negligence."
Stony ground... just like I said. I don't need to know you or your parents or anybody else associated with you. Your mouth speaks for your heart. You professed the Word for a while but you withered under a minimal trial of your faith.
This is one of the most vile and disturbing threads that I have ever seen on a Christian website. I am not sure what is worse the OP or the some of the responses.
"So yes, I would say God had a bit of a tall order on his hands in my case"
There's your problem. How on earth did you come to the conclusion that you give God orders? You do realize that there is a God and it's not you? You are trying to fashion a god of your own making and complain when he doesn't act as you want.
FocusOnTheUnseen, thankyou. Thanks for reading what we've said, thanks for thinking about it, thanks for responding to it. You've not owed us anything, and you still did more than hang around.
I'd like to ask you a different question, trite as it may be: what brings you to say that three years (and, now, two months) is too long for you? Why not wait any longer?
You know, I am not someone who would sugar coat how things are and how I feel because I've learned along time ago that transparency a good friend. So, PLEASE I pray that you take this as TOUGH SISTERLY-ADVICE... AFTER ALL IF YOU READ OTHER POST, YOU KNEW WHAT YOU WERE GETTING YOURSELF INTO HERE.
ENOUGH! It seems like you're acting like a child. Did you not read my ORIGINAL response? Do you not understand the word of God? Did he not reassure that "revenge" is his? Who can defend us better than he? If you agree, than you need to learn how to let go and let God.
I don't need you to repeat your Christian Family history again; I got that clear. But you need to understand that your salvation is at risk here.
We don't know if we are PROMISED TOMORROW, and yet you decide to PLAY with your salvation. The almighty is not to be RECKONED with.
Keep in mind that he is not going to judge your Christian upbringing. He going to judge YOU AND YOUR WORKS ALONE.
IF YOU READ MY ORIGINAL ANSWER TO YOUR POST, you would understand WHY these things happen.
Have you asked yourself which one are you?
If you are the UNSUSPECTING, Then you need to question your faith with the LORD.
Or are you being used by the WOLVES?
THINK and FIGHT! HE SAYS TO ALSO BE WEARY OF OURSELVES.
You are to busy FOCUSING on what's not important.
LASTLY... There is no better remedy for me to SNAP out of a rut and STRAIGHTEN up than when JESUS says "WOE":
Seven times in Matthew 23 Jesus pronounces �Woe� =
is grievous distress, affliction, or trouble. It�s an exclamation of grief or lamentation.
USE IT as a type of MIRROR for SELF- EXAMINATION, JESUS will say �WOE� TO YOU�
- If I preach, but do not practice (Matthew 23:3).
- If I expect more of others than I am willing to do (Matthew 23:4).
- If I do all my deeds to be seen by others (Matthew 23:5).
- If I exalt myself (Matthew 23:5-12).
- If I serve as a hindrance at the entrance of the kingdom of heaven (Matthew 23:13-15).
- If I am blinded by human tradition and worldly reasoning (Matthew 23:16-22).
- If I neglect the weightier matters of God�s expectations (Matthew 23:23-24).
- If I am filthy and hypocritical on the inside (Matthew 23:25-28).
- If I am confronted with Truth and refuse to respond (Matthew 23:29-36).
The �good news� of Jesus Christ is that it is not too late (Matthew 23:37-39). For those who are willing to respond to God�s offer of grace, the opportunity for redemption still stands (1 Peter 3:18-22)
"WillBDunne", you clearly must not have read what I said about the young lady telling my own sister-in-law that GOD WANTS ME TO HAVE A WIFE! So I not only believed for what I asked...I HAD ABSOLUTE CERTAINTY OF IT! That's where the difference happens to be! By the way, I had confirmation before I ever met that young lady...I had confirmation from within the church. An elderly woman stood up before service one morning and said God had a message for someone in the church...and this elderly woman knew absolutely NOTHING about me! She said, "You've prayed and asked God for something and believed you received it...you're expecting a miracle...don't give up on your faith!" To the best of my knowledge and belief, those were her exact words. I'm able to remember it that easily even after about 3 years simply because it was that significant!
"GraceUndeserved", when I said "tall order", that's simply a figure of speech...I didn't order God around like a drill sergeant...I was raised better than that. I simply believed I would receive what I asked when I prayed...and if you've read the above statement, then I'm sure you can see that I have proof of that.
"Bloodnok", hmmm...why not wait any longer??? Because I was already serving within the church on a weekly basis and continued (until about January of this year) to serve even after the young lady had ended the relationship. Plus, it was holding back my ability to serve on a higher level. I was going to make another comment here...and some of you might be able to guess what it would've been, but I'm not going to say it because I didn't join this website to make half the people on here mad at me...I was simply in the pursuit of having a better chance of finding a wife because I live in a rather small town. Too many of the young ladies around here are into drinking, sleeping around, and other stuff that I want nothing to do with.
Why would you be banned, Moichepit? I havent seen you insult anyone, spam, or use abusive language. Telling someone they are wrong is not a bannable offence.
