Author Thread: Rock Hard Heart
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Rock Hard Heart
Posted : 16 Sep, 2010 10:22 PM

Over the years, as a result of my disability I have known nothing but rejection. Dating never went past the first of third date. Women in high school often used me to get to there boyfriend or for some other reason. This was a condition that was partly or mostly created by my disability. As a result I have developed a Rock Hard Heart. I don't know anything but rejection so I have become accustomed to it. In fact rejection is more comfortable to me than a relationship. I didn't choose this but it just developed that way. Even when I was making love to my fiance I found that I was unable to let her in. I just don't know how to do it. I was never afforded the ability to or given the opportunity to. I make so many mistakes as the result of my disability that I just expect a bad relationship to happen. It is completely unfamiliar territory for me. Emotions just don't make sense to me. This started after a few dates in high school and it just developed.



I really don't know how to cross the boundary into emotions. I want to but I just don't know what to do about it.

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Gabriel2004

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Rock Hard Heart
Posted : 25 Mar, 2011 01:55 AM

Hi! I wonder if you have seen a specialist? Your case is

ADD, ADHD, and Aspergers Syndrome which is a special type of autism that is most misunderstood. You don't appear you need medical attention because you are a very bright student/pupil. But you do need it and perhaps left untreated.



You need to see a specialist doctor and you need to read some good books too regarding ego as a home work assignment for quick healing.



I recommend A New Earth (by Eckhart Tolle) which discuss a lot about ego. The core, the structure, the many faces of ego, the pain bodies (the DRAMA) etc.



Sermon on the Mount by Emmet Fox. It tackles about Christ teachings. Righteousness and sins committed already in the mind, not just a mere act. That's why Jesus said looking lustfully means adultery already and hatred means murder already.



These books both discussed that our outside life is a reflection of our inner or mental state. Therefore, we need to change the way we think. Biblically it says " be subject to the entire renewal of your MIND daily".. The WORD of God is good to meditate rather than thinking our pain, past and limitations. The promises of God will renew our mind if we start doing it. Read and DO.



Background of the ego. Our false self. Jesus usually said, "If you want to follow me, forget about yourself and come follow me". Self means EGO. That's why Jesus said, "My burden is light". Because being God, He has no ego. Satan's weapon.

Ego is the cause of depression, mental disorder, hypertention, emotional breakdown, obesity (caused by stress), insomia, anorexia, bolimia, suicide and many more. Survey shows 85% of sickness of wealthy counties are caused by the thought/mind. Elizabeth Taylor and Michael Jackson has pain killer and sleeping tablet addictions.



It was my battle myself for several years ago because of being egoistic. My testimony is, I am healed now completely.

Peace, joy and contentment I have now.



Your case is not isolated although it maybe obvious. Some are fighting the same battle as you, simply they can hide it. And that is the difference. The point is, evident or not both of you are suffering.



God bless you. May God heal the entire you.





Gabriel2004

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