Author	Thread: Hurt, Heartbroken, and Lost
Admin	Hurt, Heartbroken, and Lost Posted : 14 May, 2017 09:13 PM Hello Everyone!!!! I met a woman on here about a month ago from Nashville, TN. I never thought she would write me back but when she did I was surprised and happy. We started talking and hit it off so well. The more we talked the more we discovered how much we had in common. She told me right away that she could tell that she was falling for me. She also told me that she really wanted to meet me and that she wished she could just come over to my apartment and hang out. I told her that I wished the same. The next day we talked about meeting in person. I told her that I wasn't really comfortable traveling by myself because I've never done it before. I told her I would ask a good friend of mine to go with me but if he said no I told her that I was willing to take the plunge and come on my own. A few days later I contacted a travel agency here about booking a flight and hotel. The woman I spoke with told me if I went from June 3rd - June 10th I could get a flight for around $200. I told her this and all of a sudden I felt like her demeanor/attitude changed. She told me that she was glad I was coming but that she couldn't hang out with me for the entirety of my trip and that she could only hang out with me at night. I told her that that was okay and that we would figure something out. A few days later she left to travel to Nepal because she's a missionary/disaster relief responder and she works for Hope Force International and she was going to help the people over there. I didn't get to talk to her much and she didn't really talk to me while there. I started to feel like she was losing interest so I mentioned to her that she said in the beginning that she could tell that she was falling for me and I asked her if she still felt this way. I also reminded her that she said that she could not literally wait to meet me and I asked her if she still felt this way. I asked her these questions more than once because I wanted to be sure that she still liked me. She wrote me back and said: Now is not the time or place to have this conversation. The next morning I got a response from her that read: The answer to both questions is no. I feel like you're so insecure and that's a big turn off for me. You're a good guy. Just not for me. When I read that I was absolutely devastated. I felt like my heart had been ripped out of my chest. I was very hurt and heartbroken. I wondered to myself: How could someone who I like a lot do this to me? How did this happen? Granted, before all of this I was very scared to tell her that I have Cerebral Palsy because I was afraid that she would stop talking to me like every other woman in my past. She didn't and I was very happy. Anyway....ever since all of this happened I have tried talking to her but she won't talk to me. She has blocked me from sending her messages on Facebook. She also unfriended me on Facebook. I liked her so much and I felt so strongly about her that I told her that I was willing to move to Nashville, TN to make things work. I shared personal things with her about my life that I don't share with just anyone. She made me so happy that people at my church said they could notice a difference in me. They said they noticed a change in my personality and my attitude. I felt like I finally met the person that I was supposed to be with. I felt like God was telling me that this was the woman he wanted me to be with. I cannot get this woman out of my head. I cannot stop thinking about her. She means a lot to me. If a woman can make me feel this way then I know that she is special. I wanted to become closer to God because of her. I wanted to be a better person because of her. I've never felt like this with anyone else. I was so happy and now I feel lost. I feel depressed. I feel like I've hit rock bottom. My heart really hurts. I feel lost without her. I don't understand how someone could be so interested in me and then a few days later tell me that she's no longer interested in me. I don't understand how someone could be so excited that they want to meet me to they are no longer interested in me that they think I'm so insecure. Now, I know you all will think I'm crazy but this all happened within a week. I know that's not long but I believe anyone can fall in love. Have any of you experienced something like this? Part of me wants to move on but a big part of me doesn't. How do I move on? I'm having a real hard time with this. I miss her text messages. I miss talking to her. Someone who I'm very close with at my church told me to write her a letter so I did. I want to send it to her but I feel like sending her a letter won't do any good. I feel like she won't even open it and if she does I feel like she'll tear it up and throw it in the garbage. Does anyone have any suggestions? Any ideas? I don't think I'll ever be the same again. Post Reply
View Profile History	Hurt, Heartbroken, and Lost Posted : 17 May, 2017 09:09 AM Yes we are all different. I was just pointing out hidden potholes that hindsight tends to illuminate with annoying glee. As long as you are sure you want to do it, then do it, I just get uncomfortable sometimes with such discussions with a feeling of "this is not supposed to be shared". And yes I know that moving on is simpler said than done.... each hole is different and some can take a long time to fill up again. The really deep one's can come back years later when you least expect it but that's another discussion entirely. Also I did not mean to imply that you specifically pity yourself, the situation I described is universal and usually only really bad with bi-polar individuals (with some actually hearing it almost audibly) but it's there for everyone. Post Reply
View Profile History	Hurt, Heartbroken, and Lost Posted : 17 May, 2017 10:49 AM Well, I'm not afraid to post anything or say what I think on here. I'm very blunt and I tell it like it is. I'm sure I want to do it and I'm going to do it. Why are you uncomfortable? It's just a letter telling her how I feel and besides you and I are the only ones responding to my post. I don't think you were implying that I pity myself. I think you were implying that people are judgmental. I thank God I don't have bi-polar. I don't think I would be able to deal with it. I have a friend who does and he used to start fights with me on the phone. I would be going through something and I would call him just for someone to talk to and he would be like I don't want to hear it and anytime I tried to talk he wouldn't let me. He would cut me off and not even let me get a word in. I used to get so mad over it that I hung up on him numerous times. I stopped talking to him for awhile just because his behavior was getting in the way of our friendship. Anyway....sorry I went off on a tangent. I tend to do that. Please forgive me. Post Reply
View Profile History	Hurt, Heartbroken, and Lost Posted : 17 May, 2017 11:26 AM I just have this part of my personality that wants people to keep their private lives private. And any public display off affection makes me self conscious and so on. I'll be (for example) the guy in the argument getting angry about the other person shouting because then everyone else knows that we're fighting in the first place nevermind what exactly we are fighting about. And I'm oversensitive about anything smelling of gossip, etc... I live in a small town full of pretentious people it's been burnt into me hahaha. Also once something is on the internet it never goes away, no matter what recess it's done in. Best to always act as if on public display, no secret shall not be inconveniently revealed at some point. It is not inconceivable that at some point the person being discussed accidentally happens upon such an conversation and might not like being discussed the way he/she is. So while it's fine being general about things with a few details where needed.... getting deep is neither wise not good manners really. Post Reply
View Profile History	Hurt, Heartbroken, and Lost Posted : 17 May, 2017 12:25 PM I agree with you. People shouldn't air their dirty laundry. The purpose of these forums is to get help from others and to get a different perspective right? I honestly don't care if this woman happens to accidentally stumble upon this post and I really don't care if she might not like being discussed the way she is. Had she not hurt me and ended things so quickly I wouldn't be on here discussing it. It might not be wise or good manners but like I said I'm very blunt and I tell it like it is and I don't care if someone gets butt hurt over it. I want her to see what I've written so she realizes how bad she hurt me. It's obvious to me that I didn't mean that much to her as she claimed otherwise I don't think she would've been so quick to drop me. Post Reply
View Profile History	Hurt, Heartbroken, and Lost Posted : 18 Jun, 2017 10:30 AM women are not nuts, we are the WEAKER gender, that means you need to be the leader, the sane one so to speak, women especially feminine ones are in touch with our feelings, and sometimes thoughs feelings control us and we need a strong loving man to take control, sit us down, hold our hand, show empathy to our feelings EVEN if you dont understand them, you dont have understand why she feels the way she does, but if you want to keep her, you DO need to show you care about how she feels. the world needs good men, theyre hard to find, we need good leaders, good family men. i hope you find a good woman and lead her well, God bless you Post Reply
InGodsGrip View Profile History	Hurt, Heartbroken, and Lost Posted : 20 Jun, 2017 03:07 PM Sounds to me like you fell into the infatuation trap. I've been there. In my case we dated & did as much together as we could for 3 months. I met him in the "real world," not online. Very soon he new my family, I knew his family & it was overwhelmingly obvious we were crazy for each other. Until... he up and decided he didn't want it anymore. Dropped me like a hot rock. I hate to say it, but if that wasn't "real love" after 3 months of real world togetherness, there's no way a week on the internet with someone you never met is the real thing either. I feel your pain. It hurt like crazy because we were looking towards marriage in discussion. Freely talked about it with no fear for either of us. Tons of chemistry & personality gelled... until! Until? "This can't be happening" ... but it did. "It was so real " ... but it wasn't. And we had fallen for each other so fast that we were both swept over the waterfall. It was short & sweet but ended bitterly. Such is the great unfairness of life. For me, healing took roots when I realized I was in love with who I made him out to be in my mind. And that I let him be my source of happiness instead of finding joy in the Lord, people will let you down. Repeatedly. I'm sorry she broke your heart, but learn the lesson to not give in so fast to the twitterpation.. easier said than done, I know. If it's meant to be, and if it's meant to last, it'll come with time. It must have a foundation of friendship to weather the storm of life. Hope my words help & encourage you. Post Reply
Elnz23 View Profile History	Hurt, Heartbroken, and Lost Posted : 14 Sep, 2017 11:24 PM Where do broken hearts go? Post Reply

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