Author	Thread: Do u have the angguish and the longing to belong to someone?
Admin	Do u have the angguish and the longing to belong to someone? Posted : 24 Apr, 2011 10:02 AM SINGLEHOOD according to Paul is there of a blessing, for such state we can give all but our undivided attention for the work of God... But would you agree with me that down deep inside in a man's or woman's heart is the longing to be love and to belong. That sometimes i thought stepping out from the will of God just to pursue such so called love will make me happy, only to end up in anguish and pain... I hope my heart will learn to wait upon the will of God? knowing that by faith the right man will come along.... Post Reply
View Profile History	Do u have the angguish and the longing to belong to someone? Posted : 24 Apr, 2011 06:13 PM I feel this same anguish sometimes, I try not to let that feeling get to me, it helps to focus on the Lord and matters at hand, and to distract yourself. I will pray for you, you will find someone who loves the Lord and you. Post Reply
View Profile History	Do u have the angguish and the longing to belong to someone? Posted : 24 Apr, 2011 07:38 PM I feel the anguish of being single a lot, especially as I watch the other English teachers around me (who are also my neighbors) talk to their girlfriends about what to do for dinner while I go home and talk to my turtles and eat dinner alone. But I also spend a lot of time talking to God about this anguish so I know that I am not really alone, even if I feel that way! Post Reply
View Profile History	Do u have the angguish and the longing to belong to someone? Posted : 25 Apr, 2011 03:36 PM Whenever I do it's because of negative and false beliefs such as 'I'm not likeable' or 'No one loves me or cares' etc. These things are just not true and if you're in the same boat I am in that regard you need to tell yourself as much so that you stop believing it and start believing what is true. That people do love you and so on and so forth. It's so simple but it makes a world of difference when those beliefs don't rule your mindset and, by extension, life. Especially when it's just you alone with your thoughts. Tough times don't last, but tough people do. Post Reply
bcpianogal View Profile History	Do u have the angguish and the longing to belong to someone? Posted : 25 Apr, 2011 06:36 PM Yeah, sometimes I feel anguish like that. I long to find that really special guy, fall in love, get married, have kids, etc. Sometimes I wonder if it'll ever happen for me, especially when I see all my friends and relatives getting married while my own romantic life just seems to be stalled where it is...nonexistent. I know that God IS enough. He promises to be enough, and He's proven that to me through the years. But I also believe that God gives us a certain longing that can only be filled through marriage. I have to believe that as long as I still have that longing (even after turning it over to God on a daily basis), God must intend to bring along the right guy in His time. Focusing on God, and knowing that He already knows what my future will hold, is the only way that I can deal with the anguish that comes from being single and lonely. Post Reply
View Profile History	Do u have the angguish and the longing to belong to someone? Posted : 25 Apr, 2011 08:18 PM We need to remember that Paul was saying that it is good to be single so that we can focus all of our attention to full time ministry. If God is not calling you into full time ministry, then being single is not for you. One has to remember that being single while in the full time ministry is an �ideal�, but Paul was also realistic in that he realized many would not remain single. My biggest frustration is when people use Paul�s urging to remain single as a tool to make you feel guilty for wanting to be married. If you are single, then God must be calling you to stay single. How many of us who are single devote all of our free time to working in the ministry? Post Reply
anyann View Profile History	Do u have the angguish and the longing to belong to someone? Posted : 25 Apr, 2011 10:19 PM a good question, Cobbler; if we were we wouldn't be here :) Post Reply
View Profile History	Do u have the angguish and the longing to belong to someone? Posted : 28 Apr, 2011 12:08 PM its an encouraging thought to me that its not just me who feels such longing...yeah, and times i ask myself whats wrong with me? why am i still single and my friends are starting a family having kids..and yeah, sometimes its wishing we have someone to plan dinner with, or send just an i love you card to that special someone we have... but the bible is very clear everything that is happening in our lives have reasons.. no detail in our lives is unknown to God. Abraham waited too long for him to have is son, if they didnt reach 90 indeed Sarah will not bear a son. am telling myself everything works together for good who loves the Lord.... i just have to deal with this things... Post Reply
View Profile History	Do u have the angguish and the longing to belong to someone? Posted : 1 May, 2011 03:07 PM It is a very difficult thing to deal with sometimes, because God created us for relationship. We are made to love and be loved by others in both a platonic and romantic way. That natural desire is always there, lurking beneath the surface. For some the struggle is harder than others when it comes to being single. I personally have had a very difficult time adjusting since I broke up with my last girlfriend because I do miss the feeling of being loved and having the bond that we shared. But the thing that keeps me going is that because of my great desire for that sort of relationship, I know that God already has someone special all picked out for me and I'm not going to spend all my days alone. He is currently working in both of us and preparing us for the day He brings us together and I am greatly looking forward to that day. :-) Until then, all I can do is be patient and allow my relationship with God fill the void in my life. Post Reply
View Profile History	Do u have the angguish and the longing to belong to someone? Posted : 28 May, 2011 08:56 PM I often think of Paul's words too and agree with many of thoughts expressed here, that it should remind us to focus on God, that Paul's words can be abused to bring condemnation. I think personally that Paul was trying to emphasize how important it is married or single that we give God our greatest focus. That Paul is just saying I wish you could all be like me and have any distraction. Thankfully God didn't make relationships as distractions, or detriments. He made them, and saw they were good, that man was not good when he was alone. The helpmeet He made for Adam, far from pulling him off course, was meant to be a help to Adam, to fulfill his purpose and bring him closer to perfection and completion of his task. In God's sovereignty bringing two together as one should do just that, bring us closer to God, to perfection and completion. I too struggle much with loneliness, seeing others so fulfilled around me and feeling left outta the loop. Sometimes this has led me to sin, to err in my path not trusting that God does not with hold any good thing. But graciously He draws me back and helps me to learn patience. Helps me to understand there are lessons to learn in struggles, in loneliness that others, married or single, will face and need to what He has shown me. Post Reply
View Profile History	Do u have the angguish and the longing to belong to someone? Posted : 29 May, 2011 11:27 AM I'm not sure if anyone is still checking up on this thread but if anyone is I just wanted to add that I listened to a really good 2 part sermon at Ravvi Zacharias site called Growing Through our Disciplines that has given me much focus in dealing with loneliness and longing. Post Reply

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