Author Thread: How do you deal with loneliness?
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How do you deal with loneliness?
Posted : 16 Jul, 2010 11:48 PM

I've taken a lot of time thinking on the subject. I'm not entirely sure how one deals with loneliness. Is this something God fixes, can a knowledge of Christ mend a lonely and/or broken heart?



Or can another person possibly fill a void that is there, who is equally yoked with you and loves Christ? Do you use various distractions, perhaps spend more quality time with friends or family, if you have those means. What cures loneliness?

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How do you deal with loneliness?
Posted : 17 Jul, 2010 05:29 AM

Alot of things I think. Loneliness can be defined a couple different ways I think.



There is that loneliness where you are missing companionship (either friends or a special someone). There is also the loneliness when the world is just out to get you that day and nothing is going right.



The former is hard to deal with. Personally I deal with it more than I do the other type I mentioned. Sometimes daydreaming helps, letting me go into my own little world where I rule and I can do what I please. Granted you need to keep your head and understand its an escape, not reality. I havnt had a hard time with it, but I am sure others may. Talking with a good friend and just venting or explaining as best you can can help alot. I did that actually this past weekend as I was lonely and a bit depressed. It helped. Loneliness concerning a special someone is the hardest I think *waits for someone to bash me for that one just cause it hit a grove*



Sometimes, if its missing your friends, you just have to wait to see them. It hurts, but it may be the only option. As for the latter, well, that is where daydreaming helps me the most. If I can get through the day that is. I get through the day without killing something, then it usually works. Other times, well, you got to s u c k it up, scream if you have the chance, and survive. Thankfully those days are not frequent, but they do happen to everyone.



Sometimes you just need to pray/cry/yell/tell God what is exactly on your mind/and fall asleep while doing so.



Other times you need to dive into a hobby.



Like I said, there are alot of ways to fight it. Its taking ones own advice that is hard. Hope that helps or answers your question!

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DontHitThatMark

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How do you deal with loneliness?
Posted : 17 Jul, 2010 11:11 AM

Trust that God knows what's best for you....but that's a cure-all for every problem. I've always felt different than other people, and that set the loneliness into more of a habit than a feeling for me. I had to stop caring about it after awhile, and strangely enough, soon after that I found someone as close to me as I could hope to expect in a different human being. I think maybe God was trying to teach me something. So my advice would be to stop caring, and let God have it. I know this sounds mean, but honestly? It's all selfishness anyway. We think we know what we need to make everything better, and we think we know when we're ready for it....and we don't like to think about how wrong we are. Just trust God and focus on what He has given you already. School, work, whatever. I'm not saying that we shouldn't keep avenues open or go on dates, we never know what path God is going to call us down, but we should be watching for God's leading above everything, even our desires/loneliness.





:peace::peace:

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How do you deal with loneliness?
Posted : 17 Jul, 2010 03:21 PM

Thank you both.

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How do you deal with loneliness?
Posted : 17 Jul, 2010 04:06 PM

lonely= too many boundaries

the opposite of lonely= not enough boundaries

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How do you deal with loneliness?
Posted : 17 Jul, 2010 04:15 PM

Thanks, Brandon, that makes a bit more sense.

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How do you deal with loneliness?
Posted : 17 Jul, 2010 04:17 PM

Sorry, I only partially read the question. As far as a broken heart goes, you overcome it by getting stronger. It's you fighting for your independence. It's not easy, but it's right and worth it.

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stormcountry33

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How do you deal with loneliness?
Posted : 18 Jul, 2010 08:59 PM

@donthitthemark,

what you said makes sense for my kind of lonely...I'm trying to let go and let God instead. there is someone that I'm interest in and I have a good feeling about the possibility of what God may be doing. I have said that I wan His will to be done so if that means I'm not to be with her then I ask that He help me to accept that...how were you able to "foget" about it? Just asking cause that's been my problem for roughly the past 10 years. Thanks brother!

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DontHitThatMark

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How do you deal with loneliness?
Posted : 19 Jul, 2010 08:48 AM

Are you sure you want to know?:laugh: When I was around 14-15 years old...I had a very small, seemingly pathetic traumatic event with the first girl I cared about. The problem was caused by a rather large developing ego, and I've been trying very hard to kill my pride/selfishness ever since. It finally came to a head when I realized that my desire to "not feel so alone" was insanely selfish and probably pretty insulting to God. I mean, God is supposed to be the most important thing, why was I so lonely when I had God? The "prolonged loneliness" may have been a life lesson that letting other things make us unhappy actually puts them above our relationship with God. Instead of putting God first and trusting Him, and then enjoying the blessings that He knew I needed, praising Him for His wisdom and viewing Him as the source of my happiness...I was actually cursing God silently, and letting other things control my attitude. The weeds were choking my spiritual growth. "I want this! Why aren't you giving it to me?! I know what I need!" Anyway...I'm not there yet, and it is really not as easy as just saying "I trust you". It has to be built up, or at least it did with me. And it's still not complete, because now it's money that's giving me problems, and I just need to let it go, do what is right, and trust God to handle it. It's a lot harder than it sounds though...because we've grown up wanting control/power over our own lives. We think we know whats best, and we forget that we're stupid, degenerate, self-seeking, blind, and sinful.



"There is a way which seemeth right unto a man, but the end thereof are the ways of death."



So, always look for God's leading...we only THINK we know what is right for us. Basically, all we have to do is what we should be doing anyway. Become like Jesus. Self-sacrificing, humble, and submitted to His Father's will.



:peace::peace:





P.S. God's leading usually looks like a lot of uncanny coincidences. Just be sure you're honest, and don't invent stuff to try to make what you want fit into God's plan. If you can do that, then I believe God will give you what is best for you in the long run.

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riveroflife1

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How do you deal with loneliness?
Posted : 20 Jul, 2010 08:57 PM

for years i never got lonely...then it hit me and its a terrible feeling.

but one thing i noticed, when i backed away from ministry and i was kind of idle, that's when the loneliness hit.

so, spend more time with your Father and get involved more at church :)

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kezza12

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How do you deal with loneliness?
Posted : 23 Aug, 2010 05:53 PM

I think we deal with loneliness by finding other things to throw ourselves into. I know that for me, staying busy is the key to not being a mope. Our Sr. Pastor once explained it as "Investing in yourself, and others on a non-romantic level, so that once God brings that person you're meant to be with into your life, you are well practiced at the art of relationship building"



I don't know if that makes sense to you, but it made a ton of sense to me.

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