Thread: I just had to vent..lol..read at your own risk! j/k
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I just had to vent..lol..read at your own risk! j/k
Posted : 17 Sep, 2009 10:21 AM
I am okay being alone and I have been alone for the biggest part of my life, due to the fact that It's really hard for a guy to even get my attention. I like the aggressive, cocky, sarcastic,funny, sweet, caring, honest, I'm hot and I know It kinda guys...that love Jesus and have a HUGE heart...but oddly enough, those kinda men are really hard to come by! (that mixure of personality traits TOGETHER is really rare..lol) I know they are out there but do I really have to go through all these Mr Wrongs...before I find Mr. Right? agh It shouldnt be this hard. not that I am really even looking..I dont search through mens or womens profiles on this sight...and If by chance I do, It Is only with a friendship In mind..I have only gotten to know one man off of this sight and he had all of the personality traits that I was looking for and MORE....He was off tha hook! lol j/k but In the end a friendship Is all we chose to have due to various reasons...
The only reason I even set up this account was to humer my parents...whom, thought that It would be a good idea to put myself out there If I expect to ever meet a good guy...but I of course, I have a completely different view point on this.....I dont feel like I should have to put myself out there...If God, wants me with somebody then shouldnt he just bring him my way? It would be a whole lot easier! geesh.
I had to vent....thanks for listening. I feel much better now.
I just had to vent..lol..read at your own risk! j/k
Posted : 17 Sep, 2009 12:30 PM
I see what you mean, but here's a couple things:
If you are asking God to help with your finances, does he drop money out of the sky? No - he provides a way for you to earn the needed money. It's kind of the same thing with dating. God isn't going to just have Mr. Right come knocking at your door - you need to do your part, which is putting yourself out there. :)
You listed what type of guy you're attracted to and what type you want - but are these traits, especially all in the same package, really Godly? Perhaps that's one of the reasons God led you to a Christian dating site - to show you what other types of men there are and to show you what Godly looks like. Maybe you're here for counsel or maybe to counsel someone else - who knows. But God has placed you here for a reason, don't you think?
And don't forget - sometimes it takes a LOT of fishing before you finally reel in a keeper. ;-)
I just had to vent..lol..read at your own risk! j/k
Posted : 17 Sep, 2009 12:58 PM
Yeah..I know what you mean..God and I probably need to get on the same page because what I want and what he wants for me probably arent the same things! lol
I am trying to be a lil more open to talking with guys that I wouldnt normally even take an interest In..so, I'm getting there slowly but surely, I normally dont even mess with the whole dating thing and what not because It's so stressful, but I'm gonna give it a try and see what happens. I have no doubt In my mind that God will lead me to the right one, and The sooner the better!!!!!!!! lol
Oh, and please dont read my last post wrong. I am by no means some stuck up chick that thinks I am better then everyone else...haha, I am far from It! The only thing I really have to offer a guy Is LOVE and ALOT OF IT! I def. wasnt gifted In to many areas! lol
I just had to vent..lol..read at your own risk! j/k
Posted : 20 Sep, 2009 04:36 PM
You know, What really helped me was getting to understand the type of person god created me. God says to seek a mate of godly character and to be equally yoked. Well, To me that means compatibility and having a god centered of their life.
If you join Christian mingle, even if you aren't goin to pay; they have a test called "the color code test". In their, They give your specific color type and what your traits are, then they go into details like : what your needs, whats, what makes you hot, what makes you not etc.. Then, They take it a step further and show how compatible you are with the other code personailities. IT shows what the potential hazards and the potential pluses being with each color, in correlation with your personality. SO for example, I scored blue, and it all actuality you can make a relationship work with any color/person; just some take an incredible amount of work and when you have a relationship with god to be concerned about, kind just complicates things anywayz. Anyways, I'm a blue and My natural color type is a yellow.
I've have notice a huge difference, looking for someone that is closer compatible personality wise, than as opposed, to what first appeals to my eyes naturally. IF you look at the dating site success stories, you often see people being end up together that you never would of thought could hit it off but that's just because we've been fed non-sense hollywood matching.
Anyways, I second what the post stated above. God answers are prayers, when we have faith he will and take a step in purseing the step in that direction.
I just had to vent..lol..read at your own risk! j/k
Posted : 21 Sep, 2009 05:45 AM
Well who knows, maybe you will find what you are looking for here in this site .. but if you just want to humor your parents and not really looking for good guy with godly qualities/values, then who knows what kind of guy you will also find al. I think finding a mate through dating site is like tribulation...even the elite will be deceived.... hahahhaha.
It requires more prayer, more discernment and more focus on God and not the person. It is trusting the Father more than your own mind or feelings.
I just had to vent..lol..read at your own risk! j/k
Posted : 22 Sep, 2009 08:59 AM
I said this, "I like the aggressive, cocky, sarcastic,funny, sweet, caring, honest, I'm hot and I know It kinda guys...that love Jesus and have a HUGE heart."
but maybe I should have said It like this, " I am normally drawn towards men who are very confident with themselves..and aren't passive when It comes to going after what they want. I love a good laugh so a man with a sense of humor Is a must, I like to be romanced, so I would hope to find somebody someday who Isn't afraid of showing and receiving affection. But, put all of that aside..I don't care what kind of qualities a man has, If he doesn't have Jesus! That Is the most Important thing to me!"
I just had to vent..lol..read at your own risk! j/k
Posted : 22 Sep, 2009 03:47 PM
This is great!!! I must say that it's thoroughly entertaining! Like better than going on an outing with the seniors' singles group of First United Methodist entertaining; and if you've never done that you really should!
I really think that I should say something before I get started: you ladies are quite lucky that I'm on this site because I do fine with the opposite sex in real life and as a result I really don't give a cr*p what you think about anything that I say and as a result, I am free to tell the truth exactly as I see it with no regard to impressing any of you. Actually, come to think of it that's how I am with ladies in real life... go figure.
The reason that you have trouble finding the kind of guy that you are attracted to (btw, I know that if you found all of the secular qualities that you listed in a guy and none of the Christian ones, you'd fall head over heals for him and make it your personal mission to save him) is that you have a couple things working against you. The first thing is that the American Church has a skewed definition of humility. We, as men, are taught to be the spineless sort of "nice" guys who turn the other cheek and get trampled on. We are taught that weakness is a virtue. It isn't. Fortitude is a virtue. I know, God shows himself strong in our weaknesses; but that doesn't mean that we don't have any strengths or that we aren't to use any of our strengths. What we are then left with in the Church are a bunch of "nice" guys who finish last. And that's the truth, nice guys are friends, not lovers.
This actually leads us to the other thing that you have working against you, YOUR strengths. You said that you don't have much to offer other than love. John Lennon was wrong. You need more than just love. A cocky/confident man is such because he knows that he is gifted in some way. Moreover, he knows what he's gifted in and understands how to utilize that gift. Actually, the more gifted a man you want, the more gifted you'll need to be in order to sustain his gifts. Does that make sense?
Your pretty. But is that's all you have to offer then you will fall way short of the standard of the truly gifted man that you desire. I have spoken to really hot chicks, perfect 10's, who at the end of the conversation were lucky to get a 7 or even a 6.
In the end, you reap what you sow. If you sow into yourself and your giftings then you'll reap a gifted and confident man.
I just had to vent..lol..read at your own risk! j/k
Posted : 23 Sep, 2009 09:54 AM
Glad to know that my post was a form of entertainment for you...Can't say I have ever had an outing with the seniors' singles group... although, I would find It quite amusing myself..(I might just look into that. lol)
There Is nothing wrong with speaking your mind..not that you would really care If I thought otherwise..seeing, as how you do fine with the ladies In real life...so, more power to ya! lol
The main reason I have trouble finding the kind of men I go for Is due to the simple fact that up Intill now I was not looking and I did not make myself available to the men who were Interested. I will never make It my personal mission to win any man to christ with the intentions of pursuing a relationship with that person....If he Is not a christian then , he has no chance with me..(it's that simple) ..been there, done that..lesson learned.
Nice guys/ girls do tend to come In las, considering that I see myself as one of themt... but, I am not a fake....It's just who I am. Yes, I tend to turn the other cheek at times but not because of my beliefs, I would just rather take the high road. (although, I do have my moments! lol) then involve myself with any kind of drama.
When I said I dont have much to offer, I was refurring to material things....
Love Is one of the greatest gifts you can give anybody..alot of men/women dont know how to love the way It says to In, 1 Corinthians
Chapter 13
.Thanks for the advise.....be blessed! :rocknroll:
I just had to vent..lol..read at your own risk! j/k
Posted : 24 Sep, 2009 01:14 AM
Okay...please Ignore this forum post..apparently, I wasn't thinking clearly whenever I posted this one...cause It makes absolutely no sense at all. which, Isnt unusual for me because I tend to ramble on about certain things without thinking or carefully reading them before posting! lol
Be prepared for the worst though, cause I'm sure this wont be the last one and It's probably not the first!
I just had to vent..lol..read at your own risk! j/k
Posted : 30 Sep, 2009 02:24 PM
Well...thar' be a huge difference between cocky and confident. If anybody that has skillz wants to know how to really impress the ladies...surprise them. I love being underestimated. Don't brag about it, don't try and make opportunities to show it off. That's pride. I'm sure a lot of the ladies will agree. I guess what I'm trying to say is, be nice mix of humble and confident...from what I've heard from most of the opposite sex, "cocky" is not attractive. Confidence is. I'm sorry if I sound like I'm disagreeing with you, Dave...but I know some of the brother's out there might see "cocky", and take it at face value...bad choice of words, good message. There are a lot of arrogant asteroids out there that think they're good at stuff when they aren't...but I suppose anything that inspires guys to confidence is going to have some wackos sign up....anyway...just remember that just because we're supposed to be confident does not rule out humility. We are supposed to be confident, but we're also supposed to be humble. There is a balance, that's all I'm trying to say.
