Author Thread: Question on dating - am I overreacting?
gypsyJoyce

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Question on dating - am I overreacting?
Posted : 6 Nov, 2018 08:46 AM

Hey there. I started dating a really great guy about 2 months ago. We've been on 5 dates in that time and texted each other. My question is about how things are going now. We have gone from two weeks in between dates to three weeks and from texting most days to only texting a couple of times a week. The guy said he was looking to date to find a marriage partner, but it seems impossible if you don't spend time together to get to know each other. I'm wondering if this is normal or if he's losing interest and how and when I should say something about it. Or should I just wait for him to make a move.



I appreciate any advice.

Lola

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Jayzeee

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Question on dating - am I overreacting?
Posted : 6 Nov, 2018 11:01 AM

Yes I think it's perfectly normal in the early days of a relationship, you're seeing each other but not yet commited. I wouldn't be in a rush to say anything about it just yet, but would definitely keep an eye on things and then decide what to do.

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Question on dating - am I overreacting?
Posted : 6 Nov, 2018 06:56 PM

I'm not the best one to ask, but it would seem like your over thinking things. 5 dates in 2 mouths seems like a lot, more so if you met him online. but that is just me.

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Question on dating - am I overreacting?
Posted : 7 Nov, 2018 05:35 PM

Hi Lola I think you should pose the question, sometimes the person is afraid to start that uneasy conversation. I might be scared or not interested but what ever it is he should be man enough to share his ever he is feeling with you. Its challenging when you are left in limbo trying to figure things out on your own and doesn't make it right to keep you in a somewhat confused mindset. We don't have time to waist and communication is the key to help people deal with situations and find clarity.

hope this helps be blessed

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LittleDavid

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Question on dating - am I overreacting?
Posted : 11 Nov, 2018 05:24 PM

I don’t think you’re overreacting.





Sounds like you’re thinking thinking things through. Perhaps in a considerate manner you could ask him about the relationship and let him know you’re still interested. But be prepared to graciously accept whatever his response without expressing disappointment. Grace and goodwill are rare but powerful traits and they make you memorable.

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LittleDavid

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Question on dating - am I overreacting?
Posted : 11 Nov, 2018 05:26 PM

Sorry, I only needed one “thinking”

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Dazz

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Question on dating - am I overreacting?
Posted : 13 Nov, 2018 08:21 AM

You're possibly over-reacting,

but either way I wouldn't grill him over it. Nothing good will come of that. If he's lost interest, then it won't win him back. And if there isn't a problem, then being badgered could create one. There's just no upside.



I'm not going to tell you how to run your relationship, but I'll just ask are you doing everything possible to show him that you're interested.??

Remember that fear of rejection can become self-fulfilling.

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Obediencetotheword

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Question on dating - am I overreacting?
Posted : 29 Dec, 2018 06:34 PM

Hi Joyce, I can understand how you feel. Being a woman to be pursued, we are often left to wonder. But at our age, that should no longer be the case. This is why I have indicated in my profile that I would like to be courted, not dated. Courting is intentional and the goal between the man who is courting and the woman being courted is to get to know each other to figure out if they are suitable mates for marriage. It is a mature approach, it takes two, and anyone is free to say if it not a match. Dating as Merriam Webster defined it is - to go out; to do an activity together. Courting, on the other hand, is defined as to act in a way to indicate you want to get married. So, if a guy is just looking for a friend, anything, and clearly not a marriage partner, then it is wise to conclude he will date and not court. That is the first indicator. In your situation, you may need to figure out what you are looking for and communicate that in your profile. That is a great filter. As to your current situation, if he contacts you (within the week, since you mentioned it has been 3 weeks of no communication), ask him what he is looking for. Is he looking to date or is it more intentional (meaning he is looking for the person he will marry)? If he does not contact you within the week, my conclusion is, he is dating, you and others.

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Question on dating - am I overreacting?
Posted : 4 Feb, 2019 08:33 AM

You are wise to be careful and thoughtful in your approach to dating. Usually if a man is interested in a woman, he is eager to get to know her and spend time with her. Is he asking questions about you that are not the typical, superficial ones, but show that he really wants to know who you are? Is he quick to respond - as if he can't wait to hear your answer and then answer your questions? Does he actually listen to you and then based on your responses, show you he cares? It might be prudent to have a conversation about how he views dating and is it a courtship process or just dating for fun. Some guys date multiple women at the same time. Have you talked about your thoughts on dating?

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