Author	Thread: New Developement/Goodbye
Admin	New Developement/Goodbye Posted : 20 Oct, 2012 12:19 AM I did something I'm somewhat not proud of today. Frustration and disenchantment were running at all-time highs and I figured if I was going to be ignored no matter what I might as well give her something worth ignoring, so I found a really attractive girls profile who no doubt has ignored hundreds of guys profiles and more than likely mine if I were to give it an honest shot and not do what I did instead which was send a really sarcastic message with thinly disrespectful references as to how she's probably just a loser. She replied, defending herself then deleted her profile. I really don't know why I kinda feel bad about it though since truth be told I'm extremely cynical towards women, since they would do just that to me and then move on without giving it a second thought, so I figure why should they get to have all the fun. Part of me thinks I should feel remorse and part of me wants to steel myself to foolish sentimental feelings like that. Should I do that is my question I guess, or would I just be a pathetic fool if I where to embrace feelings of remorse. I'll probably delete my profile in a week or so after this threads run its course just cuz of this ugly new developement and how low this site gets me when it comes to women, people, and the world and just how sick of the whole thing I am. Its just not worth it, even as "another option" and this instance has made me realize that. To say it's dead weight would probably the largest understatement of my life and any time or effort I spend on here is too much. Post Reply
View Profile History	New Developement/Goodbye Posted : 20 Oct, 2012 04:03 AM Someone, no doubt... Would be better equipped to respond to this. The Lord's love is something that once inside of us flows through us and makes those dark, not so fuzzy, not so warm feelings disappear. The Lord convicts us of our wrong doings, our hurtful words.. that is what sets us apart from the world, among many other things. I myself have bitterly hurt people before and have had to ask forgiveness, because I was convicted and I felt a stirring in my heart. Post Reply
NRSV1953 View Profile History	New Developement/Goodbye Posted : 20 Oct, 2012 07:32 AM To "IOnlyDate," Yes, you should feel remorse and you should feel guilty as all get-out! You've intentionally hurt another human being whose only crime against you was her looks. Are you any better than those who pick on someone who is not physically attractive? You are cynical; not a good place to come from if you want to find a friend, must less a wife. Please get your heart right again before attempting to date. You have a lot to offer to the right woman, but lashing out at innocent ones here on CDFF won't find her. Please go back and read St. Francis prayer again. Remember, "the greatest of these is Love." Perhaps, if you allow God to work on your heart and mind through God's loving Grace, you will be in a better position to attract the right woman to you. I wish you only the best and pray that you learn and grow in Christian Love! ~Your CDFF Ex-Cheerleader in Christ Post Reply
View Profile History	New Developement/Goodbye Posted : 20 Oct, 2012 12:55 PM You are to be commended brother. Not for what you did, but for having the character and the courage to confess your wrong doing publicly. James 5:16 Confess your faults one to another, and pray one for another, that ye may be healed. The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much. Post Reply
Moichepit View Profile History	New Developement/Goodbye Posted : 22 Oct, 2012 01:32 AM You my friend... Are refreshing. Reading what you wrote did not cause a great concern nor even a stir in me. It was more like a "whatever" type of attitude because you were taking responsibility for your imprudence. I am not condoning what you did. I myself had that intention. But there are certain things that are said by other wise people I know and ofcourse verses in the living word that causes me not to react as I would have before I met my Love (God). At one point I even got scared of myself because I felt that I was becoming numb and immune and insensitive. Seriously. God is clear in his word. That we should hold fast, not falter, easily moved nor be surprised by others acts as the world is not easy, perfect, clean, as forgiving, it is trivial , blind, wavering like the female you offended. Why? Because there are other ways to handle an altercation besides "storming out" We must not forget that life is full of test that we have to learn how to ace no matter what or who it is. God bless, brother. I'm glad that you fell remorse because that tells me that God's hands is in you, molding you to be better than your actions, better than yesterday. And yes you did the right thing by confessing your faults. And I'm pretty sure that if she was that upset, she would have remembered your name to show other people how rude you were. Post Reply
View Profile History	New Developement/Goodbye Posted : 23 Oct, 2012 05:32 AM Yes, the lack of response is frustrating - it's why I deactivated my profile for several months - no, it's worse than frustrating, it's demoralising when it seems like time after time after time nobody will even give you a chance. It's not surprising we come to resent them, especially as from their own profile we'd be perfect together, but we don't even get acknowledged let alone the opportunity to prove ourselves. But if this site is your only experience of online dating, let me tell you it's the same on all of them and in all the forums across the net you'll hear the same cry of despair from both sides. Admittedly, women do have it easier in getting replies, but then, have you ever been worried when you replied to a woman that she might just be trying to get you in bed?! As for your behaviour, you've done the devil's work for him (and probably more effectively being a member of her own "family") - you might want to read up what the bible says about the tongue and the need to tame it! Sure, it's easy to feel they deserve it, or at least need to know how you feel - but why is two hurting people better than one? As Christians we must choose to curb our emotions and speak as Christ would have - not because they're deserving of it, but because it's the right thing to do. Post Reply
View Profile History	New Developement/Goodbye Posted : 26 Oct, 2012 04:32 AM Their is nothing wrong with taking a break. In my relationship with my future bride we both blow it and need to humble our selves and ask forgiveness. We as people have sensitive areas of our hearts that cause us to react to oneanother. Your admiting it to us is a good thing. It would have been good if you could have asked forgiveness to the Lady you offended. One thing that helps me is....Be swift to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry.... How is ths expressed practically in relationship? Well first we need to go to the one who has offended us and ask clarification of what was said. We need to have the courage to let them know what it communicated to us. One key thing is identifying why it hurt so much and where that hurt originated from. We often missinterpet what others are saying to us especially here in writing. That is the listening part. The slow to speak part is not allowing our mouths to express the negitive ... you always do this attitude. To not allow our mouths to point the finger. This is real difficult most times. Thats why we need to slow it down. If we practice listening and slow speach and give time for our emotions as men to process then we will be greater equipped to controll our anger. I grew up in a home full of anger and yelling but because of biblical principles. As I practically began to impliment those truths I changed inwardly as a man. I remember going over that verse in my mind many times. Now I dont have too because it is internally who I am. In Christ, Michael Post Reply