Author	Thread: question
Seuss View Profile History	question Posted : 29 Jul, 2012 02:46 PM Why do men well want to get friendly but then say they are christians and think its okay to fool around? I am so confused. I wanted to be careful how I worded this. Post Reply
View Profile History	question Posted : 29 Jul, 2012 03:07 PM You are probably going to have to ask the specific man or men that do that as to why they do it. All the rest is really going to just reduce to speculation. Post Reply
View Profile History	question Posted : 29 Jul, 2012 05:23 PM Clearly these men are NOT Christians. They say that because that's what you're looking for. Right? Post Reply
View Profile History	question Posted : 29 Jul, 2012 08:45 PM Maybe, Seuss, what MsMarvel said - I hear that's a big one to watch out for! Maybe a guy doing this is a Christian in a moment of weakness. Maybe he is a Christian who genuinely believes that fooling around in a less-than-committed relationship is ok, though the bible might have something to say about that. I think BobBobbins has it (who needs me? :D). No speculation will tell you what another person's motives are. Ask away! Post Reply
PatientlyWaiting555 View Profile History	question Posted : 29 Jul, 2012 09:10 PM I can only tell you my experiences. The ones who have believed in sex before marriage have been the ones who say they are Christians, have been the ones who are not pro active in the Christian life. They didn't attend church, never had Godly mentoring, and didn't seem to be concerned about my spiritual life. They didn't ask me questions. They were all surface questions like "What do you do for work?" "Have kids?" etc... Post Reply
PatientlyWaiting555 View Profile History	question Posted : 29 Jul, 2012 09:11 PM Sorry, the men never asked me questions about my spiritual walk, my relationship w/Jesus. Post Reply
KiwiMav View Profile History	question Posted : 30 Jul, 2012 08:29 PM Perhaps it is because they are Diddle Brains. Post Reply
agnezz View Profile History	question Posted : 31 Jul, 2012 07:55 AM sometimes its easier said that done, a lot of individuals would say they are a christian.. but i think if you are truly a christian yourself you would notice if that person really is a christian by how he reacts and interacts with you. so as christian women also, we need to scrutinize the motives of this men... Post Reply
View Profile History	question Posted : 31 Jul, 2012 12:09 PM Sadly in todays society with all the porn so easily available. You might find this happening alot more. There are some very Godly men out there that would not try to get sexual with you. Even if they were tempted, they would leave the date early if they had too. For lukewarm christian men, or even some men that say they are christians but really arent, you will see them getting sexual alot more. My advice to you is to always be on guard, Set your own boundaries, and if he crosses them, tell him thats too far. If he crosses them agian. He's outta there. Maybe after he gets a few dumps, and un returned phone calls, he might get the picture and start being more respectful. Some christian people believe watching porn is ok, because they aren't hurting anyone. But the problem with that is (what we feed grows). Thier boundaries with women will get more blurry because of thier porn watching. Now don't bash men thinking of men are pigs cause they watch porn, because I know some women that struggle with porn too. Basically my advice...Every person is different, so every date will be different. Until you really get to know someone, you will need to have up really good boundaries. Only date in public, don't date after ten pm. Theres some really good christian dating books out there. I personally like the book "Undressed". It taught me alot about dating, and boundaries. Also sometimes you could be the cause of them getting all sexual. If you dress provactively, or talk about inappropriate things. I have fought with this problem alot. I currently don't date..but when I start dating agian, I will have to make boundaries, and enforce them. Try not to judge them, and degrade them if they do act like a pig. Maybe they honestly don't know better. Or don't get it. You can explain why its wrong, and bible verses if you want to. Or just leave. And you can also pray for that person. Pray that they are convicted and repent and treat thier next dating partner better. This is all a learning process. I do believe God will put people in each others lives to teach them. Use it as a learning experience and move on. Post Reply
View Profile History	question Posted : 31 Jul, 2012 03:24 PM Men think one of two ways. By their flesh which answers the why you asked in the first place or by their Spirit which will respect who you are, help you with your spiritual walk and even ask to pray with you the moment they know you are truely Christian. Post Reply
View Profile History	question Posted : 31 Jul, 2012 04:49 PM At best they are imature believers at worst they are chaff or goats. Either way adviod them. Their is no need to understand their motives. Just protect your self because they only care about their flesh. Ephesians 2:1-3 1And you He made alive, who were dead in trespasses and sins, 2in which you once walked according to the course of this world, according to the prince of the power of the air, the spirit who now works in the sons of disobedience, 3among whom also we all once conducted ourselves in the lusts of our flesh, fulfilling the desires of the flesh and of the mind, and were by nature children of wrath, just as the others. Raise the standard, Michael Post Reply

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