What is marriage? According to Dr. Jay Adams it is a covenant of companionship. I like that definition. It goes back to the Original purpose in the beginning. It is not good for man to be alone. Man needs companionship. And God�s choice was a woman, not a dog or another man.
God joined them together by creating them male and female. God created them specifically to be joined together. But companionship goes far beyond sex. What God has joined together let not man put asunder. Jesus said this to the Pharisees. It is the only time He defines marriage and quotes the Genesis account of Adam & Eve. It seems that God�s idea of joining them together was to create them (physically) to complement each other as companions.
It should be noted that Adam already had fellowship with God on a daily basis. But He still needed God to make a woman and put them together in the garden. And they lived happily ever after, in paradise where the skies are not cloudy all day, right? Maybe, but there is still much confusion about marriage, husband/wife roles and Christian ethics?
Couples break fellowship. They break the commitment or covenant of companionship. But they are still made in God�s image. They are still made by God to be joined together. And the man is still alone.
A couple of signs of the last days says, they will �be giving and receiving in marriage.� This may mean everything is going as usual. Or it may mean today�s divorce rate is a sign the end may not be so close. We may need a revival in the happy & successful marriage category.
It also says false teachers will come with among other things seducing spirits and doctrines of demons, 1 Tim 4:1. one such doctrine is forbidding to marry. By forbidding to marry man is not only left alone, he is bombarded by outside sexual temptations without any Godly means of escape. We live in a hyper sexualized culture. Rev. 17 give an example of the ways and method of operation for a harlot. She is not a companion. She is out to get the man who is alone. Many become drunk on her cup of abominations/fornications. And this a counterfeit of what God intended to join man and wife together. It can even creep into marriage when the husband get eyes full of adultery
2 Peter 2:14 or it may be the wife who plays the harlot with her husband demanding more and more of what she can not rightly have (Idolatry).
IOW, there is a right way and a wrong way. So define marriage if you can in anything other than a purely legalistic way. To define marriage as God meant for it to be seems hard. But though I cannot define it I know it when I see it.
I believe much of what you say. For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother, and be joined to a wife, and the two shall become one flesh. Beautiful. But what does it really mean? The act of coupling physically? Producing offspring? What?
Well what was God's goal at this point? To multiply, and fill the earth. So, if we take this in context, we see where the two becoming one flesh, is accomplished in reproduction. That child is the one flesh that you both produced. Of course the act of coupling is enjoyable, it would have to override most other feelings to ensure the survival of the species without His intervention.
When a man and woman are joined in marriage, it is not ever supposed to be about our lust for the other, by whatever name you want to call it. It is a spiritual joining of two souls for the purpose of support, companionship, reproduction, and the worship of God. Can you imagine the beauty of holding your wife in your arms as you give thanks to our Father for the blessings He bestows on us each day? Having the love of both of you combine in divine worship of our Savior?
Or both of you on your knees looking down on your firstborn, and dedicating his life to God. Thanking Him that He trusted you with the raising of His child?
To me, these are a small example of what marriage really is. Anything less, and you are robbing yourself.
But that really didn't come from me. I started writing and it just poured out without any thought. It had to come from God, I am just not that good at explaining things.
I heard once during a teaching on marriage, I think it was Chuck Swindall, say, "Marriage is both finding the right person to JOIN together with another person as one. As well as BEING the right person to be in that union as one."
Sometimes we seek Mr. Right or Ms. Right, never searching or as Paul says, examing ourselves, to see if we're indeed the right person, for the person we seek...
We all have some idea of what a biblical marriage is. I like the account of Isaac and Rebecca.
�he lifted up his eyes and looked, and behold, there were camels coming. And Rebekah lifted up her eyes, and when she saw Isaac, she alighted from the camel,
and said to the servant, "Who is the man yonder, walking in the field to meet us?" The servant said, "It is my master." So she took her veil and covered herself.
And the servant told Isaac all the things that he had done. Then Isaac brought her into the tent, and took Rebekah, and she became his wife; and he loved her. So Isaac was comforted after his mother's death.� Genesis 24:62-67 RSV.
Note that there is no record of any vows, oaths or ceremonies. There is no wedding celebration mentioned in this passage. The marriage had already been agreed upon and arranged by the servant. The key here is the relationship. God is in the relationship business. He created family and relationships. This passage shows a comforting relationship after the death of Isaac�s mother. Like the Holy Spirit a wife can be another comforter. marriage is more than a license or legal standing.
Those are some interesting thoughts, and I agree to a certain point. Here is what I have a problem with. I assume you love the woman, or you wouldn't be involved with her in the first place, so you will want to protect and provide for her. I mean, that is what we men do, and we enjoy being able to.
In our time and place, without the paperwork, if something were to happen to you, she would be left without financial help. By legally making her your wife, you are showing more than just your commitment to her, you are protecting her from harm, should something happen to you.
I don�t know about that. Most agree the MAN is to be the provider. And quote how a man who does not provide is worse than an infidel. But that scripture is talking about taking care of the elderly and widows.
Ultimately we look to God as the provider not a man. And husbands and wives should be in one accord seeking God�s direction, where two agree.
In an age where laws are being changed to include gay marriage do we really want the state to tell us what a marriage is? Do we have to respect there authority to define marriage and/ or a biblical marriage. One reason divorce rates are going down is because couples are now choosing to live as common law marriage.
There are those who quote scripture much better than I can...but, a male who creates a child with a woman and does not do everything he can to ensure the woman and child will be cared for if something were to happen to him is not much of a man in my humble opinion. Today, males and females are procreating without the bonds of marriage at unprecedanted rates. The children...oh my the children. They are so often being left to raise themselves after one of the parents decides to walk away from the other parent. After all, why not? There is no commitment. I have heard so many times from parents...no, we aren't married...we just aren't ready to make a commitment yet. Hello! You have a child together. That isn't a commitment?
The sheer selfishness of them astounds me. If you are not ready to committ to raising a child...there are ways to avoid it. Yet, goodness no. People have to shack up. Instant gratification. After all, it is nobody else's business. The fact that these children are often needing care, attention, and intervention doesn't matter.
Simply put, if a person is not ready to be a parent, they do not need to be engaging in the activities that result in children. If they are going to engage in these activities, they need to be married. Study after study show that children need TWO parents. Look at our society. Prove me wrong. There is a reason it takes two people to make a child....it takes two to raise the child. Ask any parent.....children are precious but they are royal pains and extremely expensive not to mention time consuming.
If a man truly loves a woman, he will not want to hurt her. A woman having an illegitimate child on her own....that hurts. The emotional, financial, and every other hurt that accompanies this .... well, a man would not do that to a woman he loved. A prostitute, sure. (Don't agree with it, but I can see it). A male who is not a man, sure. An animal with no control over his body, of course. But a strong man who is in love with the woman. No way. In lust, sure he will. But not if he is in love.
So, just some musing for your amusement. Sadly, males are impregnating our teen girls at a skyrocketing rate and then abandoing the children to raise the babies....as our tax-dollars support them. What a sad reflection on our country and times.
It is natural to love your own children. I believe not to do so is what the bible calls those without natural affection Romans 1:31
And in most cases children are part of what makes a marriage. I supported my children. But now they are all grown and I am single with several grandkids. You mention the parental responsibility toward raising children and the problems of single parents. But you have to believe GOD WATCHES OVER THEM too. Jesus Loves the little children. Even in a household full of hostility fighting and strife or drug addictions. It is sometimes better for a harmful parent to disappear IMHO. But in general, you are right. Children deserve both parents. Parenting skills go right along with making a marriage work.
