We don't consciously decide...

Posted : 10 Sep, 2010 11:05 AM

We don't consciously decide who we are attracted to. It isn't a logical decision. No man or woman sits down, makes a pros and cons list for someone they just met, decides that person checks off enough boxes on a list, and then decides to find that person attractive or unattractive.

Instead, everything about that person gets run through the brain, and "I'm not attracted," "I'm a little attracted, so there's potential for more," or "I'm REALLY attracted" comes out. Keep in mind that this is about way more than just physical attraction or chemistry. It's everything you've shown that person about yourself up til now that leads to overall attraction.

Am I trying to say that we have no control over who we date or get involved with? Not at all. We can know that getting involved with someone wouldn't be a good idea and choose not to get closer to them and risk our feelings taking us where we don't want to go.

What I am saying though, is that it's important to remember that people are attracted to who you are and based on who they are. Getting mad at someone for not being interested in you is a waste of time, because it's not really their fault. They didn't choose not to "click" with you. You can't expect someone's feelings for you to change just because you feel a certain way about them either.

All you can really do is seek to become the best version of yourself you can be. Positive changes, such as getting in better shape, keeping your apartment cleaner, becoming more reliable, taking up a hobby, getting out of your comfort zone, reading your bible and praying more, getting more involved at church, etc. are all a part of cutting and polishing the diamond that is you. That way, when you don't click with someone, you'll be much more likely to think, "Oh well, I guess we just weren't meant to be" because you're content with who you are and know that you are the best you that you can be.

Post Reply

We don't consciously decide...

Posted : 15 Sep, 2010 08:00 AM

Aw man! I'm learning new things! This is great! I had those guys all wrong. So the whole time they are telling you to be perverted self-loving jerks, they're actually telling us to read our bible and wait for marriage!? I need to formally apologize. Those dudes are awesome. Really confusing! But awesome...







:peace::peace:

Post Reply

We don't consciously decide...

Posted : 15 Sep, 2010 08:22 AM

Maybe you were just following the wrong ones...

Post Reply

We don't consciously decide...

Posted : 15 Sep, 2010 03:06 PM

Hey, I wasn't following any of them! The sarcasm ends here!:laugh::goofball:



:peace::peace:

Post Reply

We don't consciously decide...

Posted : 15 Sep, 2010 04:38 PM

Well if you weren't following them, then how did you know about them?



/the sarcasm did not end there

Post Reply

We don't consciously decide...

Posted : 15 Sep, 2010 05:43 PM

Good question. A friend recommended him to me. I listened to the first couple "sessions" and I wanted to kill myself for having man-parts because it meant I had something in common with him:laugh:...so, yeah....not following them. I'll follow Jesus. He has all the relationship advice anyone ever needs. Not being sarcastic:winksmile:.



:peace::peace:

Post Reply

We don't consciously decide...

Posted : 17 Sep, 2010 04:47 AM

Guys like David D'Angelo I now see as stand up comedians. Which is why The Office is such a great show in reminding ourselves that we can take ourselves and our theories too seriously and thinking us or others have it all together.

Post Reply

We don't consciously decide...

Posted : 17 Sep, 2010 09:08 AM

Yeah, he's definitely got some humor, but that is not how he's selling himself, and he's turning guys into...well...I don't want to be censored, but he kinda turned my friend into one...when it comes to women anyway.





:peace::peace:

Post Reply

We don't consciously decide...

Posted : 17 Sep, 2010 09:01 PM

Post Reply

We don't consciously decide...

Posted : 18 Sep, 2010 06:00 AM

Ah HA! A spy!!!:devil:



:peace::peace:

Post Reply