Author Thread: Losing Hope in Online Dating
HazelEyesSparkle

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Losing Hope in Online Dating
Posted : 25 Apr, 2024 10:22 PM

I've been on this site for a while now and really am not meeting anyone of value to be honest. It's been a pretty terrible experience. Usually it's some kind of big flaw they have. I did meet one person from here but it turned into mind games, barely any conversation, way too far from me distance-wise (which is 95% people that chat with me on here).



I have a friend who met someone on here and has been married to the man for 8 years so I thought I'd give it a shot.



I am thinking of just deleting this app but I do like talking and chatting such as getting to know people, just not the dating aspect of it.



I do want to meet people in person and lately have been acting more approachable towards others like smiling, making eye contact, and being off my phone. My ideal way of finding someone would be in person.



Should I delete the app and just focus on finding someone in real life?

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Handyman62

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Losing Hope in Online Dating
Posted : 28 Apr, 2024 08:35 PM

Since you don't want to answer my question I will just give out some more information.



From around 18 to roughly their 30s, most women just want to party and have fun. But beginning in their 30s women begin realize they are going to hit the wall soon and decide to get serious about finding a husband. They all start looking for a tall, built, attractive, well spoken man who's a high earner.

The problem is most men like that are in very high demand. Ironically so were most of those women who were partying away their younger years. But now those women aren't in such high demand but believe they still deserve that "high demand guy".

That "high demand guy" is more interested in younger women, but are still be willing to have fun with an older woman but will be unlikely to take her seriously for anything else. Part of the reason for that is as women get older they tend to become more difficult to get along with. It's usually because as they get older they earn more more money, are more independent and have become more masculine, which for some odd reason they think is attractive to men. That's not to say there aren't plenty of men that would have them. It's just that these women are stuck on that "high demand guy" they can't have but stupidly reject average men.

In the event they happen to date a "high demand guy" and he rejects her. Then it's because he has a character flaw and not because she's just not that attractive to him. On the other hand if she goes out with an average guy she will typically reject him and also site a character flaw as the reason.

Here's part of the problem. Women are born physically attractive and in the modern world they rely on their beauty to attract and extract wealth from men. Many never seem to learn that you also have to be beautiful on the inside. That's mostly due to the sheer amount of attention that men give them, which in turn gives women a false sense that they are the whole package and perfect the way they are.

To God they may be but that's not real life so if your personality is lousy then it will eventually have a more profound impact, especially later in life. Most women think they are the prize and many men would agree. That is until he has to deal with that lousy personality of hers. But of course she will always claim it was him and not her and society will agree with her.

Hear this ladies. Men are very tolerant of women's flaws so if you're having problems attracting men or keeping men. IT'S NOT THEM IT'S YOU.

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WalkNTalk

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Losing Hope in Online Dating
Posted : 29 Apr, 2024 05:02 PM

No harm in staying single.

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HazelEyesSparkle

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Losing Hope in Online Dating
Posted : 30 Apr, 2024 11:49 PM

@WalkNTalk yes, honestly at this point staying single is the absolute best option. I have to agree!

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Moonlight7

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Losing Hope in Online Dating
Posted : 1 May, 2024 04:45 AM

Best not to get desperate to marry any man now, you are still Young and one will more and likely come your way that you will really love.

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Handyman62

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Posted : 1 May, 2024 10:11 AM

As with most modern women, HazelEyesSparkle has thrown away her best chance of marriage by waiting until the last minute to get serious about it. The biggest problem women come up against when waiting is biological. Women begin to lose their eggs some where around their 30s and by 35 most women have none left. There are exceptions to the rule but it's rare.

There are other problems, like the longer a woman stays unattached the more set in her ways she becomes. This makes it harder for her to allow a man in her life. She becomes bossy and masculine which makes her just plain disagreeable. These are but some of the things that make her hard to live with. There's at least one study that shows the more bed partners a woman has the more difficult it becomes for her to pair bond. I also think that over time dating multiple men will have a similar result.

Contrary to popular belief it's women who are to bend to the mans will and not the other way around. There is no equality on Earth between the genders and that's by God's design. Most like to ignore that God designed a family hierarchy with God above men and men above women. He equipped men to be leaders and women to be followers.

It's women's natural proclivity to follow that has been used against them by Satan. He's been whispering in their ears just like he did in the garden of Eden. He's telling them they are just as good or better than men at everything and so most have fallen into his trap which has brought about the destruction of the family hierarchy.

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Jayzeee

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Losing Hope in Online Dating
Posted : 1 May, 2024 11:08 AM

Well that’s not true at all women can conceive children right up to the menopause. You just don’t see it much now but as a child I often saw middle aged women who were pregnant. My maternal grandmother had her last child at 56 she’s 3 years older than my oldest brother…:-)

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Jayzeee

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Posted : 1 May, 2024 11:11 AM

My aunt not my my grandmother who is obviously deceased…:-)

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Handyman62

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Posted : 1 May, 2024 11:19 AM

I honestly think the worst advice to give HazelEyesSparkle is to tell her wait or give up. She needs to look at herself and make changes that will attract a good man. After all isn't finding a man what she really wants?

So I'm again going to attempt to give HazelEyesSparkle some good advice. First I believe you are looking for the wrong things in a man. What that is doing is leading you to men that aren't looking for you. Now they may be good men or maybe they're not, I don't know. But what I do know is there's no connection between you and them.

As I have stated before men are not hard to please and will put up with a lot from a woman. So what that means is at least for the most part, the problem is likely with you.

I don't know enough about you to tell you exactly where your faults are. But because you're young you likely have fallen for Satan's trap about equality. Get that out of your head because it's not scriptural. However being submissive is and this is what most men want in a woman and one of the things God wants women to be.

Maybe I'm wrong but as far as I know you never spoke about trying to meet men at Church. Does that mean you rarely go to Church? I honestly think that would be a great place to meet men. But most Christian women aren't likely to be attracted to real Christian men becasue they aren't the exciting bad boy types. These men are typically much more mild mannered and in control of their emotions which sadly is a turn off to most women. The reason for this is because women are naturally looking for what they perceive as strong, masculine, virile men.

Christian men are like that is because God expects them to ignore many aspects of their natural self and be more Christlike. Christian women are also expected to ignore their natural self and when they don't then Christlike men aren't attractive to them.

What that means to you is you need to study the scriptures and learn to be more like what Gods tells women to be like and less like what the world (Satan) tells them to be and seek a Church going Christian man and always remember to be submissive to your husband.

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Jayzeee

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Posted : 1 May, 2024 11:27 AM

I’m not advising anyone to wait I’m just saying that that is widely spread miss information about woman’s fertility…:-)

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Handyman62

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Posted : 1 May, 2024 02:28 PM

Actually Jayzeee my previous response wasn't directed at you but this one will address what you said about fertility.

First off I did mention that there are exceptions to the rule, but most women can't have children later in life and any women who happens to conceive after 35 is considered a high risk pregnancy.

The problem with waiting to conceive is women start out with a finite number of eggs and as they age those eggs will also age and become less viable. Another problem is even if you are able to conceive later in life that egg because of it age, may not survive or the child could be born with some form of birth defect.

Part of the problem is our modern society is lying to women and telling them to focus on their careers and when they are ready they can have children. Unfortunately that's robbing some people of their best chance at having children. Another lie that's being told is for women to freeze some of their eggs so that when they're ready they can have children. But again that's another lie because by the time most women can afford to do that their eggs aren't very viable by that time, plus the freezing process takes a toll on viability.

There's much conflicting info online with numbers going all over the place. But one thing that there's consensus on and that it's much easier for women to get pregnant and have healthy children when in their 20s then after their 30s.

So I will put into cave man terms:

Easier to have baby when young not old.

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