Author	Thread: Men to the chase or ladies?
Asher_Aurelius View Profile History	Men to the chase or ladies? Posted : 1 Jul, 2011 11:39 PM It may be that men are suppose to pursue ladies, but studies have shown that the majority of initiations are made women not men; as many as 2 out of 3. If by initiating you mean introducing yourself and saying hello, this is not what is meant by initiating. However if initiation is a smile, glance, fluttering of the eyes - whether intentional or not, men react to these cues. And it seems that woman are the primary initiators. My point isn't that either should change their patterns, but the dance of love has many subtleties, I am beginning to wonder if in Christian circles there is a naivety in the courting dance. There seems to be an attitude that there is a soul-mate for me out there and that God will make it happen (love) and I need to be passive and focus on God not on finding a mate. I do not understand why we are suppose to be passive, and how being passive honours God. And that there is an aspect where essentially Christians need to learn lure prey. Would appreciate other peoples thoughts. Post Reply
View Profile History	Men to the chase or ladies? Posted : 5 Jul, 2011 03:34 PM Well, I do not have a problem with showing a man I am interested. However, I do not pursue. They are totally different in meaning. Boas Pursued Ruth in the Bible. I am not up on everything in he bible scriptures I am still studying. I do know that Man is the head. So why would a woman pursue him! :angel: Post Reply
View Profile History	Men to the chase or ladies? Posted : 5 Jul, 2011 03:38 PM Personally, I think that if you do a Bible study you will find that God brought people together in many different ways. I don�t think you can say that there is a right way, although there is certainly a wrong way. Many times it was not through their effort but through someone else. Jacob didn�t exactly go to find his wife, he was running away from his brother who wanted to kill him. I think you are referring to Isaac, where Abraham told his servant to go to his homeland to find a wife for his son. Isaac didn�t have a choice in the matter. I do agree with you that we do need to try, to at least make yourself available to each other. BC, you can at least talk to the guy, ask him about himself. Men are terrible at starting conversations, it�s generally a lot easier when the women start it. Post Reply
Asher_Aurelius View Profile History	Men to the chase or ladies? Posted : 5 Jul, 2011 04:01 PM So you think that God has a soulmate for us Cobbler? Post Reply
View Profile History	Men to the chase or ladies? Posted : 5 Jul, 2011 04:38 PM Well, first of all, I don�t believe in �soul mates�. That is a myth proposed by Plato. I believe that it is God�s will for most everyone to marry. But I don�t think he has just one person in mind, it can be any Christian woman that we wish to marry. That is why I think people fuss too much about wanting it to be �God�s will�. If you look at the Bible, about the only thing that it states that is God�s will is that we be holy. After that it�s mostly up to us, as long as we follow his principals. Yes, God has ultimate sovereignty, but I don�t think God is a micromanager. Post Reply
View Profile History	Men to the chase or ladies? Posted : 10 Jul, 2011 03:19 AM I think we get into trouble when we are not able to connect and make connections to those who are important to us and place a higher value on our want for comfort over our need to be stronger. Post Reply
View Profile History	Men to the chase or ladies? Posted : 10 Jul, 2011 03:23 AM And @bc: I don't know what them Georgia boys' deal is, but you just keep shining. Post Reply
View Profile History	Men to the chase or ladies? Posted : 10 Jul, 2011 07:27 AM Too, too much to respond to... Men do the pursuit. Women respond. A woman who you have represented as "initiating' is really flirting, responding to like your physical attributes most likely. The thing to look out for, in my opinion, is; Is she bent on basing her relationship with you on the physical...Oh, that works for a while, however if the relationship goes on, even results in marriage...well, lets just say this...the relationship will sour at some point in a big way. Post Reply
Asher_Aurelius View Profile History	Men to the chase or ladies? Posted : 10 Jul, 2011 05:33 PM One should ignore physical appearances Lovingcoman? Post Reply
View Profile History	Men to the chase or ladies? Posted : 10 Jul, 2011 07:05 PM no, physical attraction is a good thing...the thing men fall into is that physical attraction is not enough to sustain a relationship...marriage is all about self-control, leadership...trust me, its a bummer if your wife realizes her attractiveness can be a weapon to get you to do what she wants or she like refuses to have sex. Post Reply
Asher_Aurelius View Profile History	Men to the chase or ladies? Posted : 20 Jul, 2011 11:27 PM Hey I 'm a born again virgin, if my wife decided that she wanted to use sex as a weapon on me then I would call her bluff - what woman could resist me!!!! ;D I pray that I wouldn't marry someone that would be malicious and manipulate people in any situation. Yes I agree that looks are important and perhaps even ignored because the consequences of relationships for ladies have much more long term effects for ladies and therefore they tend to minimalise this aspect. Post Reply

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