Author	Thread: Childre: Prefer not to say?
Admin	Childre: Prefer not to say? Posted : 30 Apr, 2011 03:13 PM I have noticed on several profiles under the �Have Children� section that women will check the �Prefer not to say� option. Why would you prefer not to say if you have children or not? Are they too embarrassed of their children to claim them as their child? The only other option that I could think of was that their children have already passed away, but I have actually seen a fair amount of profiles with that option. Just curious. Post Reply
View Profile History	Childre: Prefer not to say? Posted : 30 Apr, 2011 03:18 PM Wow. Women do that? I've seen a few guys do that. Why bugs me is the "Prefer Not To Say" when it asks if people want children, it's kind of like, why not say you don't want them? It's all a bit vague. I don't see too many people do what you pointed out, Cobbler. I agree though, it's weird. Post Reply
View Profile History	Childre: Prefer not to say? Posted : 30 Apr, 2011 05:23 PM I think a profile with any 'Prefer Not to Say's is kindof shady. I mean, we have to be careful online anyway, and if someone is already trying to hide something, well it speaks volumes to me. I've heard a couple women say they've felt discriminated against because they have children..I dunno. Seems to me it's a package deal. It's just not being honest, in my opinion....sortof like lying by omission. I don't like it. Post Reply
View Profile History	Childre: Prefer not to say? Posted : 30 Apr, 2011 06:14 PM Browneyed, I agree that people should just select the most appropriate choice instead of hiding. One reason why people do chose to hide things is that they hope that once the person gets to know them, it won�t matter. Sometimes it works, and other times it doesn�t. As far as guys picking the �Prefer not to say� for want children, they may be like me. I have chosen �undecided/open�, but some days I know I don�t want children, and other days I know I do want children, and the days in between I flip-flop between the two. Or I will be happy to leave it up to God. Or not have children and be able to spend more time with my wife. Or have children and leave a Godly legacy Or��. Of course, it�s all meaningless if I can�t find a wife. Post Reply
View Profile History	Childre: Prefer not to say? Posted : 30 Apr, 2011 06:56 PM My cats are my kids. Does that mean I am lieing for not claiming them? Dennis? Post Reply
View Profile History	Childre: Prefer not to say? Posted : 30 Apr, 2011 07:21 PM Yes, Dennis, very dishonest of you. Post Reply
bcpianogal View Profile History	Childre: Prefer not to say? Posted : 30 Apr, 2011 07:47 PM When I see "Prefer not to say" on someone's profile, I assume that it means "Yes, but for some reason I think this answer is safer"...unless is is in the "Do you want children" space. Then I assume that it probably means "No, but I'm afraid if I say 'no' it will eliminate too many girls." Post Reply
View Profile History	Childre: Prefer not to say? Posted : 1 May, 2011 07:25 AM The answers you can choose from are too limited. I have a daughter but she doesn't live with me, or even nearby so effectively it's as though I don't as far as anyone else is concerned. But then saying I don't have isn't quite true either so 'prefer not to say' is the most accurate of the choices. At the end of the day, it's not a black/white answer like yes or no, and people are free to ask for clarification if it'd be an issue to them. Post Reply
View Profile History	Childre: Prefer not to say? Posted : 1 May, 2011 07:36 AM @brown: I don't want to put TOO much info about myself upfront - after all, everyone here already has a huge headstart compared to someone I might bump into by chance at church or out and about. Besides, several weeks ago I removed most of the information from my profile to see if it'd have any effect. As far as I can tell, it's made no difference as to whether people contact me or not so I have to wonder if there's even much point making a detailed profile. To be truthful, I'm starting to believe the biggest decider is your location and photo as to whether somebody will contact you or not. Post Reply
View Profile History	Childre: Prefer not to say? Posted : 1 May, 2011 07:50 AM DJK, I agree with you that there should be a few more choices. For me, it�s about whether or not you have children, not about where they live. It�s a lot like being pregnant, you either have a child or you don�t. Reminds me of a Sargent I had in the Air Force. He had the name of his first wife tattooed on his arm, but then regretted it when he got divorced. But, he had the names of his children tattooed on his arm because even if he had a falling out with his children, he could never change the fact that they were his. Post Reply
View Profile History	Childre: Prefer not to say? Posted : 1 May, 2011 08:05 AM Hey dkj! :waving: You said, "I don't want to put TOO much info about myself upfront - after all, everyone here already has a huge headstart compared to someone I might bump into by chance at church or out and about." Please excuse my ignorance, but I don't think I'm fully understanding what you mean. :) Post Reply

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