Author	Thread: How am I supposed to know?
Admin	How am I supposed to know? Posted : 28 Oct, 2010 09:50 PM So I'm new to this whole thing. There is one girl that I have been messaging with, but how am I supposed to know if she's interested or just making polite conversation? Post Reply
Tulip89 View Profile History	How am I supposed to know? Posted : 28 Oct, 2010 10:02 PM You can always ask for her phone number. If she's fairly long distance, maybe go for the email address first. Most girls trying to make polite conversation won't go off-site. Post Reply
cmseeker10 View Profile History	How am I supposed to know? Posted : 28 Oct, 2010 10:23 PM Phil I agree with tulip ,If you've been messaging a lot i think it is safe to ask for her IM and star catting there.You can sense things video chatting that you can't in just exchanging messages through the site.Or try inviting her on the forums.I did invite one guy here just to make sure he's serious,instead of checking the forums he deleted his profile...Hope I made a point here... Post Reply
View Profile History	How am I supposed to know? Posted : 29 Oct, 2010 03:34 AM This sort of things is frustrating for me as well. The reason why it is so frustrating is because instead of trying to come to some sort of compromise, women just tend to run away. If guy asked to email or chat with you and you are not ready, why not simply say that you are interested in getting to know him better and that you would just like to email each other a little longer. Instead, if you ask the right thing at the wrong time, women tend to run away. Post Reply
Elisa View Profile History	How am I supposed to know? Posted : 29 Oct, 2010 05:15 AM Cobbler, Maybe we should build on Sparrows ideas. We could get a safe zone with a broker there who protects folks but keeps communication occurring. In the safe zone, the lady wouldn't need to run away and hide. Just a thought. Post Reply
View Profile History	How am I supposed to know? Posted : 29 Oct, 2010 06:03 AM Phil: It is hard to know for sure. As others have suggested, you could ask if she would be comfortable doing Skype or talking on the phone. If it is long distance, ask for a personal email. Ladies need to feel safe. There are a lot of creepy men out there and you do not want to be mixed up with them in her mind. My suggestion is to ask politely and easily. Here is my suggestion. You, of course, will have to put this in your own words. "I like chatting with you like this. Would you feel comfortable if I asked for your personal email so we can talk more outside CDFF?" "I've enjoyed our time talking online and I'd like an opportunity to get to know you a bit more and spend more time with you. Would you like to try a Skype sesssion?" Let us know how it turns out. Post Reply
View Profile History	How am I supposed to know? Posted : 29 Oct, 2010 06:10 AM It is not necessarily about being safe, it is about being on the same page. If you are not at the exact same point in the relationship, then they tend to run away. You have to be a psychic and know just where she is at and never ask her to do anything she is not ready to do. I can understand not pushing someone, but there is no communication or counter offer, they just run away. For example, if you ask to call her, and she is not ready, instead of saying �Maybe in another week, I like to get to know someone a little more before calling�, they end the relationship right there. I haven�t tried the IM on this site, so I could be wrong, but it would be useful if it had voice and video capability. That way one wouldn�t have to hand out personal information to be able to talk instead of write. Post Reply
View Profile History	How am I supposed to know? Posted : 29 Oct, 2010 06:34 AM Phill, I think the best way to know if she is interested is to ask her. Tell her that you've enjoyed the conversations on-site and ask her if she is ready to/interested in moving forward to emails, telephone, etc. Genuinely seek her comfort level...show that you are specifically interested in her and what makes her feel comfortable. I personally wouldn't recommend just throwing your email address and telephone number at her...although if she says that she is ready, I think you should be the first to offer your personal information. In an on-line dating site world with scammers/players/etc...you need to show that she is special, you are looking out for her and what makes her feel secure. The answer may be yes, it may be no, or it may be that she is not ready to go off-site. If it is the last, then accept that and continue your on-site conversations. The relationship will either progress or it won't. Post Reply
View Profile History	How am I supposed to know? Posted : 29 Oct, 2010 07:37 AM If you try to catch a horse it will run away. If you chase a horse it will run away even more. If you walk towards a horse and before it moves turn around and walk away; it may takes several times but sooner or latter they will follow you. Post Reply
View Profile History	How am I supposed to know? Posted : 29 Oct, 2010 07:48 AM :laugh: wise 2sparrows...fillies are curious creatures, one of the best ways to get their attention is to pique their curiosity. But...you can lead a horse to water.... Post Reply
View Profile History	How am I supposed to know? Posted : 29 Oct, 2010 07:58 AM @GodsHandiWork ; You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make them drink. . . .but you can make darn sure they are thirsty when they get there! Post Reply

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