Author	Thread: Can a guy be too nice?
ddawg21 View Profile History	Can a guy be too nice? Posted : 9 Sep, 2010 08:49 AM I keep talking to women and I always ask them what they look for in a guy. I get the same response most of the time, "I want a guy to love me for who I am, trustworthy, God-fearing, and have things in common" and the biggest one that I hear is "I want a nice guy." which is completely understandable, I know that I wouldn't say that I would want someone to treat me like Im nothing. But can a guy be too nice? Post Reply
View Profile History	Can a guy be too nice? Posted : 9 Sep, 2010 09:27 AM That is an interesting question. What does it look like to be too nice? I think if I met someone and I felt he was to nice... it would feel like he was fake or just trying to hard. I would probably be suspicious. BUT this is coming from someone who is known to be independent and is not always good at receiving. Post Reply
View Profile History	Can a guy be too nice? Posted : 9 Sep, 2010 07:11 PM Hmmm..... "too nice" is kind of nebulous. I've had very nice strong Christian men fall by the wayside........ because they move too slow. Were they being too nice? Were they just not interested? Well, one example is after emailing a few times a week for three months I asked if he wanted to meet me, and he thought I was being pushy and broke it off. He lived 2 hours away!!! To me -- that is "too nice". Post Reply
happyjer2911 View Profile History	Can a guy be too nice? Posted : 9 Sep, 2010 07:53 PM @ godslamb. You are right. You can talk all you want online and over the phone but can never tell if you truelly like sombody if you do not meet in person. And yes men can be to "nice". i would say what is on your mind and leave it at that. God will lead you in the path that you should take. Post Reply
Tulip89 View Profile History	Can a guy be too nice? Posted : 9 Sep, 2010 09:36 PM As Pixy mentioned in one of the other threads, "nice" is so vague a word that it really doesn't have any meaning anymore. I will say that a lot of self-identified "nice guys" display a lot of passivity or do nice things as a way to manipulate girls into liking them. I think if you ask around, most women won't be big fans of either manipulation or passivity. Post Reply
TLSmiles View Profile History	Can a guy be too nice? Posted : 11 Sep, 2010 01:29 PM I pretty much agree with what's been stated. Nice is quite vague... I will say that I do not like "nice" guys who are very passive. I like more assertive guys who like to get things done. Who'll speak up if we get the wrong check at a restaurant or I know will defend my honor. If they are too "nice" and I don't see them as stepping up and just want to be romantic all the time, I don't like that. For me, the key is balance. Know how to be sweet, but also the man God called you to be :) Post Reply
DEEDEE72 View Profile History	Can a guy be too nice? Posted : 12 Sep, 2010 05:30 AM Silver fire wrote on a similar tread "To women, "nice guy" means passive, lazy, effeminate, spineless, boring, weak, unoriginal, and probably indicates that he lives with his mom." Post Reply
ddawg21 View Profile History	Can a guy be too nice? Posted : 13 Sep, 2010 12:10 PM I thank each one of you guys for replying to my post Post Reply
View Profile History	Can a guy be too nice? Posted : 19 Sep, 2010 01:08 PM So I guess when a woman is looking for a nice guy, that is a good quality. But, when she says that you are a nice guy, that is a negative quality... Almost sounds like Hillary Clinton's "politics of meaning". Of course the original meaning of nice in the English language comes from two Latin words meaning "without knowledge". The meaning of the word has really changed a lot over the years. Post Reply
View Profile History	Can a guy be too nice? Posted : 19 Sep, 2010 02:08 PM I can only speak for myself on this topic since I don't have too many lady friends I can collaborate with on this one, but here are my two cents: A problem I have faced in dating 'nice guys' is that much of the time, they are so focused on being respectful and accommodating that they lose who they are. Now, I am not saying be a bully and want everything done your way, not at all. But a lot of the time, in trying to be agreeable, some guys start to compromise on important things. As I heard a woman on television say once in advice to other women, "You want to find someone nice, but with a lot of backbone." What I took from this, and what I find attractive, is a man that is respectful and kind to everyone, but does not compromise on his beliefs or allow people to take advantage of his good nature. You don't want any of your conversations to be like this: "I love the color red." "I don't, I think it's loud and ugly." "... Yeah, I don't really like red either." Simplistic example, but hopefully I made my point. :goofball: Post Reply
ben315 View Profile History	Can a guy be too nice? Posted : 20 Sep, 2010 11:02 AM I guess that is what my problem is... being to nice and not standing up for myself. I am getting better at not letting people take advantage of me and it just feels GREAT when you call someone out for taking advantage of you. Post Reply