Author	Thread: Is this wrong of me?
Admin	Is this wrong of me? Posted : 30 Apr, 2010 02:23 PM I'm a southern white boy who was born and raised in Alabama. My parents always told me to marry a white woman cause it's not good to mix and it'd be good for our family to stay white. Anyway I have a personal preference to marry white anyway. And also I'd preferably like to marry a white woman who is from the south and shares my same southern upbringing and beliefs. I was raised in the Pentecostal church although I still believe a lot of the things I was taught I'm trying to live by faith and not by religion. I know it's not the time for me to be in a relationship but I pray God sends her soon. For now I need to grow in the Lord and as a man. I need to become stronger so I can be the man I need to be for a good Christian woman and for my family if I have one. I have so much hurt and rage in me still and I find it hard to trust anyone or love anyone. I know that sounds bad but it's something I have to worth through with God. My parents were always protective of me in a sense but at the same time they were never around, they were just telling me all this stuff of how to live, etc. It's like do as I say and not as I do. Everyone has always been like that in my life, hypocritical and trying to rule me. I pray to God for the strength and direction to overcome all the fears I have and everything bottled up inside of me. So I guess my real question is how should I go about finding a wife and should race matter? I mean I already know I'd be happier with a cute and good hearted white woman since we'd be the same race and hopefully both from the south. I just pray for love though... Post Reply
View Profile History	Is this wrong of me? Posted : 30 Apr, 2010 02:37 PM CoolSouthern your not the only one. My parents say the same thing. I personally see nothing wrong with dating people of other ethnic race. I would say if your not ready for a relationship dont worry about it yet. I have felt I have been ready fro the past couple of years and God hasnt brought that woman into my life yet either. So I have been trying to learn to be patient, sometimes it will be hard, becasue you might feel lonely becasue you dont have that love that comes from a woman, but you'll get through it. Post Reply
View Profile History	Is this wrong of me? Posted : 30 Apr, 2010 02:49 PM Hello Cool, At your young age, it is very mature of you to realize that you are not ready for a relationship. Many people get into relationships without knowing who they are and they make themselves and someone else miserable. You realize that you need to deal with and come to terms with your upbringing. Most of us were not raised in a 'Leave it to Beaver' situation and we all have to decide what of our parent's ideals we will take on as our own. You don't know what you're missing, brown sugar is da bomb! :peace::laugh: I'm just playin'! :laugh: It is of course, your preference who you get with. My great grandfather was very bitter about the injustices he and his parents suffered and listening to those stories, I had a bad attitude towards white people. I took on his anger and because I was raised with very few white people, I never had a opportunity to have the ideas he instilled in me challenged. It wasn't until I went to college and had a white roommate and met people not only from all over the US, but from other countries, that I started to get a better world view. It was a awesome experience for both of us. I was the first black person she ever met! We are still friends today. I wish you well as you start your journey in finding out who YOU are and the best place to start is with the One who created you. God is standing by ready and waiting to hear from you whenever you pray. God bless you! :dancingp: Post Reply
View Profile History	Is this wrong of me? Posted : 30 Apr, 2010 03:03 PM Actually I feel like I'm ready emotionally for the most part but I don't feel like I've grown enough to handle it all yet so yea, I need to wait till I feel completely ready. I'm mature in the sense of realizing things and admiting the truth to myself but at the same time I feel I lack in other areas and those are the ones I need to work on and emprove before I bring a woman into my life. I probably will seek to marry a white woman but if I happen to fall in love with a woman of another race then so be it. I always tell myself to follow my heart and no other people's ideals or prejudices. I say whatever and whoever you love then love it with all your heart. LOL. Love is something that comes from the individual and not from someone else's oppinions or idealologies. But I still can't help but want to marry a white southern girl cause I love the accent, I love the south, and I just want to have a child that looks like me I guess. LOL. Either way though I'll probably raise my children in the south. It's not a bad place once you get past all the racism, etc. It's a hard place to live sometimes but it's also a beautiful place. Post Reply
bcpianogal View Profile History	Is this wrong of me? Posted : 30 Apr, 2010 03:18 PM Hi Cool, I can totally relate to your preference to marry within your race. I feel very much the same way, though I do not think that it is wrong to marry someone with different skin color. I'm just personally more attracted to white guys. Here in the deep South, it can also be a bit dangerous to marry someone of a different race. Sad, but true. Prejudice is hard to overcome. Think about how many people you see who proudly display a confederate flag... As for being ready for a relationship, God will know when you are ready, and I think he won't bring the right girl along until then. 'Course, I think I'M ready for a relationship (leading to marriage), but God hasn't brought along the right guy yet, so I'm not speaking from experience! Post Reply
View Profile History	Is this wrong of me? Posted : 30 Apr, 2010 08:08 PM Cool: You seem to be a young man who understands himself and the areas he needs to grow in. Not many can say that -- no matter how old they are -- so you are ahead of the game. Hold tight to God and seek His will for your life. Remember the Bible tells us that we don't know what the future holds, even tomorrow is not certain for any of us. But, we know who holds the future. It is ok to plan, and dream. Keep talking to God about it and listen to what He has to say. He will not steer you wrong. Post Reply
View Profile History	Is this wrong of me? Posted : 30 Apr, 2010 08:12 PM Steven, I really wish you with all my heart that you find the christian white woman of your life, and i hope you will be so happy with her... God bless you so much... Yoshua Aguilar Post Reply
View Profile History	Is this wrong of me? Posted : 30 Apr, 2010 08:29 PM somebody told me this... If you love really love somebody.. Let him go... even when that person never loved me the way i really did... :(... Be happy always... Post Reply
View Profile History	Is this wrong of me? Posted : 30 Apr, 2010 08:40 PM cool, you seem to be in good hands, God bless :waving: about the race thing... well, let Jesus take the wheel. you do not sound like you are torn about it. maybe about your choice to be open to it, but still it's no big thing. the color of my skin is brown and i consider myself black, but getting to the heart of Jesus makes me care less and less. i grew up on an island, and still live on one. seeing white people on tv made me accustomed to the difference from a small age, but in person it was a little weird... since the whites who live among us are not considered as such, not by me anyway. almost everyone here is speckled with some other ethnicity. take me for example, my great grandmother on my mother's side was scottish/french/spanish, my mother's father was garifuna which is carib(native) and african. my fathers side is riddled with spanish/serian and probably everything else :laugh: i still consider myself black, so does everyone (except some indians) who are from where i grew up...Trinidad and Tobago. you seem like your on the right road, with Jesus in the ship and all :laugh: so just keep on keeping on, and love, love, love :peace: nyanda:purpleangel: Post Reply