Author	Thread: So what's missing?
stormcountry33 View Profile History	So what's missing? Posted : 21 Mar, 2010 01:34 PM I'm asking this here even though I know it could easily go both ways... Over the years I have had several women in my life that I was basically on a friendship level with them but we weren't close friends...anyway, I started to think about the possibility of that "friendship" becoming more. The typical response I always got, and yes I mean always, was that they considered me to be a brother. The confusion for me comes because these same women all have let me know that I would make a great husband, father, that I have a great sense of humor, that I'm generous and caring and thoughtful and yet for some reason I wasn't what they were looking for...I guess what I'm asking is, was it a physical thing that was the issue? How can a great guy always be another "brother"? I'm counting on you ladies to be honest with me...thanks for your thoughts. Later!~ (I guess I've never heard of a girl being referred to as a "sister") Post Reply
muggsy517 View Profile History	So what's missing? Posted : 21 Mar, 2010 02:32 PM There is a man that I am friends with and have been for years. He has made it clear to me that he would like to be more. He is such a wonderful person, that would do anything in the world for me and will make a good husband to someone. I have been upfront with him and let him know that I am just not attracted to him that way. He is not a bad looking guy, just not my "type". I have wished that I could be attracted to him, but it has never happened. With any relationship, when you are not looking, it will happen. Good Luck. Post Reply
View Profile History	So what's missing? Posted : 21 Mar, 2010 06:20 PM I have known men that I consider wonderful people and would recommend them as husbands.... just not my husband. I can only say that there was something missing. Could have been a personality trait -- could have been the Lord's leading -- could have been we were going different directions. It was just a bit different with each man so there was not ONE thing I could tell you was the reason I would not have considered the man for a husband for myself. But, it does happen. I don't konw if that helps or confuses things more. Post Reply
View Profile History	So what's missing? Posted : 22 Mar, 2010 07:02 AM From what I see all too much in life, is that you are too safe of a pick. Girls are looking for someone that sweeps them off their feet, only to be disappointed as the end result. You still are likely to find someone, but you have to wait for them to be ran over a few times before they decide on the safe and reliable option. :rocknroll: Post Reply
GraceMae View Profile History	So what's missing? Posted : 22 Mar, 2010 09:24 PM Well... I wanted to privately share something with you that I did not want to share publicly, however your age restrictions prevented me from sending you a message SC.... So, while I can't share it all, I will say... Just continue being you CS.... Your experiences here on this site are not for naught... it is part of your growing curve..... Just pay attention to what you learn, what you read, and how you relate to us all... There is a reason we are all here in community here together. Don't think it means nothing..... You are my brother in Christ, and even though we've not met, or spoken... we have shared in something special still.... here on this site..... So, take care my brother, be encouraged, and enjoy the responses!! :glow: BTW... you are somebodies GREAT catch!!!! ~ GraceMae Post Reply
View Profile History	So what's missing? Posted : 24 Mar, 2010 01:53 PM i do not think it is physical. it is more psychological. especially if you are the younger brother of a girl's best friend. it would feel preditorial to even have a stray thought. another thing is if someone is that close to me, and i find myself giving them regular advice, i tend to start to feel a sense of obligation for a lack of a better word. more like an advisor and more responsible, instead of thinking; hey this person is a really great catch! nyanda p.s just how i see it Post Reply
Tiger1968 View Profile History	So what's missing? Posted : 25 Mar, 2010 11:51 AM I believe that it has to be a blessing from God. You could be the world's most compatible couple , but if it is not in God's will the relationship won't work. Remember the old saying "Opposites Attract"? This could be very true. God has chosen a partner for you that will complement you and make you both stronger together. If you both have the same strengths and weeknesses what is there to gain? If you both have different strenghts and weaknesses then you stand to gain alot. I knew a man that didn't particularly care for the woman he ended up marrying and she never thought she would marry him. They were not at all compatible and had different beliefs in almost every category except religion. Now they are very happily married to eachother and very much in love. Their faith in God and in eachother made them one of the strongest Christian couples I've ever known. Just be patient and trust in God, for He knows exactly what he is doing. Sometimes it takes a little time for God to move you in the direction He needs you to go in order to meet your chosen life partner. Post Reply
Prodsnapper View Profile History	So what's missing? Posted : 26 Mar, 2010 11:06 AM In my experience, this usually means that they're not attracted to you. They may like you and think you're a great person, but that gut level attraction just isn't there. Once you're in the friends/brother zone there's usually no way out, but in the future you can do some things differently. It's okay to be nice but don't be tooo nice. That means don't break your neck going out of your way to do the smallest thing for a woman. If you guys hang out, make sure you have an opinion and also do some of the things you want to do. Open doors but don't be over protective. I used to have a hard time with this because, by nature, I'm a protective, helpful person. I had to learn balance and it's worked well for me. I'm proof nice guys can finish first. Hang in there brother. Post Reply
stormcountry33 View Profile History	So what's missing? Posted : 26 Mar, 2010 01:25 PM Thanks guys for your reponses...I have to say that some, not all, but some of these women from my past found themselves in tough stituation being young and pregnant and have (in my opinion) rushed into a relationship where it seems to me and maybe I'm biased but it looks like they stay in the relationship becasue while they may not be in love, the guy they are with provides for their "needs" and the real mainstay of their life is their child/ren. I don't want to pass judgement...I think it is more of just what I see... Post Reply
View Profile History	So what's missing? Posted : 27 Mar, 2010 11:26 PM maybe you don't challenge them enough? good guys will do things because they are good and it's the right thing to do. a good girl (aka the right girl for you) will want a good guy. nice guys do things because they think they can earn their affection through deeds and denial of self and are afraid to express anger. nothing wrong with a little anger as long as you don't abuse it. it's what sets your boundries. Post Reply
View Profile History	So what's missing? Posted : 27 Mar, 2010 11:36 PM actually maybe i meant assertive instead of 'expressing anger'. Post Reply

First

Page : 1 2

Next  7 >>

Last