This is the first thread I have started and I am sure it has been discussed before so I am probably bringing it up for the umpteenth time but I'm new here so please humor me.
I would like to know why there are women here who are so negative in their profiles. They talk more about what they don't like, don't want, won't do and so on and that's it! Do they really expect to get someone interested in them? Do guys do the same thing on their profiles? It is a real turn off for me and I just don't see the reason for it.
I think we can all learn how this internet dating thing works, understand that there are people who lie about what they are here for, try to scam us, and have "crazy" beliefs but we don't need to fill up our profile with our feelings about this stuff do we?
I just think some people here are missing out because they are negative and even sound angry about it. I find it very unattractive and unnecessary and I will not approach a woman with a profile that is negative like this.
Yes, there are many negative profiles posted by men too, and obversly, some want to overly describe how good they are at romancing. To me, both are turn offs.
I agree that they are missing out because they are giving us no idea of who they ARE. So, I rarely search the profiles anymore; just hang out in the forums where I can get to know people, not neccessarily for a relationship, but I feel I've made many friends.
Yea, I'm new here too. Most women who post their profiles have no clue WHO they are (in Yashua) , or what they even want in life. They're unhappy with themselves, and sadly, it comes out in their profiles. They're looking to be fulfilled by that other person, instead of being completed first by their Creator. Just be encouraged that there are a few spiritually mature, emotionally healthy women out in cyberspace and in time, you will meet the one who will complete you. May Yhwh bless you on your journey.
Hard to say exactly why that is -- but I can tell you that I've seen lots of mens profiles that go on and on and on (and on about what they want in a woman, while saying very little about themselves. They paint a picture of the woman they want (using negative terms "Must not (fill in the blank)") that no woman could hope to fill.
So what I'm saying is: It is not just women who do this -- men do, also. You are right -- we should focus on the positive, and say good things about ourselves. God wants his children to be happy!
You bring up a great point. The old saying goes..accentuate the positive and deccentuate (sp?) the negative.
Some folks have been hurt and are trying to avoid it is my take. We just need to show them God's love.
However, yes, it can be aggravating and almost downright depressing how some folks go on. Their don't list is a mile long. On the other side of the coin is the person with a do list just as long. The paragon of virtue and beauty is unrivaled and likely just as unrealistic.
Just think of the blessings if we all prayed for these people each time we came across their profiles? Who knows what miracles God would work in all our lives.
I love your thoughtful message. I also say try and look at there profiles through Jesus' eyes, with LOVE.
I like what a gentleman said in his profile "people who have inner wealth and subtance don't live for themselves but God gives them grace to be His gifts to those that He lend them to.
There is a void and unhappiness in their lives still searching to be filled with Gods' LOVE, PEACE, and JOY. Pray for them.
I agree. I think negativism can be overcome and there are ways to bring out the positive in people. I also agree that we need to pray for people who express themselves this way. There are plenty of positive things about them but I guess we have to be confident that we are not one of the "don't likes" and approach them with the love we are told to express to others. It's really what they are looking for isn't it?
I think you have brought up a great point.... as I don't think every profile that "reads" so negatively was intend to come across that way. It gives all of us an opportunity to take another look at what we have written and see if we can do a little more about seeing the blessings and sunshine in our lives.
All the ladies above me are right, in the fact that htere are many men who tend to focus on the "Must nots". I truly dont read many ladies profiles (Seems when I do, though, I walk away amazed at how nice some of them seem to be!), but I am sure there are plenty of wounded gals out there.
It is my humble opinion that most of that stems from being hurt or disappointed in the past.
Keep smiling - there are lots of great people on here!
I just think that the profiles are an extension of who they are on the inside. If they are suffering from prior relationships, of course it will come out when they write, haha it has to come out somehow...
everyone here is in different stages of their lives. maybe some fresh out of getting hurt in a bad situation so they are angry. you get what I'm saying...
believe me, men have the same things on their profiles. Everything they DONT want is written, but you can tell they are hurting on the inside. Healing takes time...
