Author	Thread: Horrible response
Wild_erness View Profile History	Horrible response Posted : 3 Jun, 2014 04:54 PM Hi, I just needed some other people to tell about what has been happening to me on this site over the last few days. I sometimes get messages that have what I call filler questions/statements and only that. Such as: How are you doing . . . Hows it going? . . . Whats up? . . . etc. I don't answer these emails, mostly because I don't like filler questions in real life, so why should I email a filler answer back, they obviously don't really want to know anything at all about me (or have not even read my profile). A few days ago I got one of these filler emails, and because of another thread on these chat forums, I decided to let him know that I did not enjoy getting a non email and how he could improve his next email to a gal and actually get a response. I said things like "you should add a picture to your profile" . . . "ask a question that I will be able to answer and you will get an actual answer" . . . "try reading the gals profile and asking a question based on what you find" . . . (I also told him that scamers tend to send one sentence questions and ask for personal info right away, therefore let him know not to do that). In response to this nice helpful email that I sent, he responded with an all caps email telling me that I was a scammer, that he didn't need my advice, that I insulted him, that I am playing games . . . and on and on . . . I was so offended that I sent back an email that said this "Hey, just trying to help. No worries, just cause I don't like to make small talk in person, doesn't mean that I will enjoy it over email. Like I said, just trying to help." He then sent me another offensive email telling me that he didn't need to apologize (for what I don't know cause I didn't ask for an apology) or that I should keep all my counseling to myself, to stop wasting his time . . . etc. He is now blocked from emailing me. My question for you all is this . . . guys have said on this forum that they want to hear back from us, even if it is to dismiss them . . . so should I keep just ignoring all the emails that I don't feel deserve a response? Or should I respond with a helpful email and just hope they don't blow up on me? Or should I just email saying "You didn't write an email that would solicit a response?" I sort of just wanted to vent to the people on this site, but also am interested in other gals stories, or guys thoughts on this. Thanks ahead of time! Post Reply
View Profile History	Horrible response Posted : 3 Jun, 2014 06:41 PM I think you did what you could and now you should just let it lie. It may be, from the fact that he had no pic and his rudeness, that he is some kind of scammer. You never know. There are plenty of nice guys on this sight; you don't need to worry about a rude one. Post Reply
Wild_erness View Profile History	Horrible response Posted : 3 Jun, 2014 07:27 PM I am not worried about him (stunned me for a minute, but put him out of my mind immediately) . . . just am wanting people's thoughts on the responses I am sending to emails that I get. Maybe I shouldn't have given the whole back story to the situation, but I really just want to know people's opinions on the last paragraph of the first post . . . the rest is just back story. BTW: I just found out that that un-gentleman has been banned from the site. Post Reply
NRSV1953 View Profile History	Horrible response Posted : 3 Jun, 2014 07:42 PM I have gotten numerous angry emails from men here on CDFF. Some don't like my profile and send me scathing, unsolicited emails and then block me so I cannot respond. I try to pray for them. My favorites however are those scammers who try to turn the Word of God around on me. I try to explain the difference between 'judging' and 'discerning' but it falls on deaf ears. I try to pray for them. Some men take quite poorly to any perceived rejection no matter how carefully it is phrased. It can be very difficult for us when our intentions are misread as communication in 2-D is rife with opportunities to be misunderstood. Try to pray for him. One of my favorite verses starts Proverbs 15: " A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger." . . . There is a whole lot of wisdom in that chapter. Try not to let the jerks, miscreants and scammers ruin your experience as there a lot of great men here too! Post Reply
Hisjoymypeace View Profile History	Horrible response Posted : 3 Jun, 2014 09:08 PM You know after reading folks responses here and the OP's question regarding email write-backs, I've just recently started using an email note that, to me, has fit the bill when trying to figure out what to say when writing a response to those "filler" messages. Trying of course not to offend, but at least giving a "neutral" return response: "This note is just to acknowledge receipt of your email. Thanks". So far I've had no negative responses or no responses at all! Which, however way it goes is fine with me! Hey.....whatever works:rolleyes:!! However I'm sorry OP you had to be put thru all that. God bless. **Honestly, I got the idea from another dating site! Post Reply
CuriousGeorge View Profile History	Horrible response Posted : 3 Jun, 2014 09:16 PM our opinion doesn't matter. if you want to respond then do it. if you don't want to then don't. but know that many are ready to lash out in frustration at the next woman who rejects them. good luck. Post Reply
Wild_erness View Profile History	Horrible response Posted : 4 Jun, 2014 05:46 AM Thanks Hisjoymypeace . . . I like that response! Neutral but direct! Post Reply
Lukia^ View Profile History	Horrible response Posted : 4 Jun, 2014 06:01 AM I think some people here are just crazy. There is a time a guy was so rash with me for viewing his profile."just viewing",and he wrote to me and said he wants nothing to do with Africans and that I should read his profile,then he blocked me.Just like that.I got disturbed,surprised, at first and wondered what I had done wrong coz I didn't even contact him,I only viewed his profile. I didn't even talk to him and he blocked me immediately. There are alot of surprises here. I think its just good to go on and forget about them. Post Reply
View Profile History	Horrible response Posted : 4 Jun, 2014 10:57 PM "I didn't even contact him, I only viewed his profile." Probably others have messaged him before, and you were the "straw that broke the camel's back" so to speak. LOL I don't know. People are weird. I have messaged a lady once, and she attacked me. I was totally not expecting the kind of response I got from her. She blocked me after the second message. I guess this "pressure" builds up in people, and you make one bad move, and the entire rage that built up in them explodes on you. Sigh. I am sorry for what happened to you, Wild_erness. You didn't do anything wrong by trying to help that fellow. I guess you may want to ignore the messages that you don't like. Though I must say it's really kind of you that you are trying to help them. Post Reply
View Profile History	Horrible response Posted : 11 Jun, 2014 11:24 AM I don't understand this backlash this guy had towards you but I do understand that a guy could feel a little hurt over something like your response. Some guys really have no idea what to say on a site like this to start a conversation. I responded to a hey what's up and ended up finding a great guy who is a great Christian that I am now dating and he just didn't know what to say. I wouldn't have ever met him if I hadn't responded to his short message. Once I responded we had very meaningful conversations and he was very fun to talk too. He just needed a push of what to talk about because he was a little shy at first. Post Reply
Apostelle View Profile History	Horrible response Posted : 12 Jun, 2014 05:41 PM Some guys egos are as fragile as crystal. They take suggestions as criticisms and personal attacks. Shrug it off and ignore him. Post Reply

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