Author Thread: Looks or Character?
jz4jfministries

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Looks or Character?
Posted : 15 Jul, 2012 08:27 AM

Since the same topic is going on the the Ask Guy category, I thought I do the same her and ask to the ladies of CDFF.



Ladies, what is the first few things you look for in us men?

a) Is it attractiveness first

b) Is it charater first

c) A bit a both

d) Or something else



thanks

Jeff

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Looks or Character?
Posted : 15 Jul, 2012 11:25 AM

I'll take D) Your godliness, first and foremost. When I see a man speak on the Lord, it is strong and powerful to me. It is of course, the flesh we see at first, but reading what some have written before I really see them is something that I believe is a gift, because you have no picture in your head, just their heart.

I will not say attractiveness does not matter to me, nor character. But in the midst of godliness, attractiveness means so little. I can't name more than 5 men I've known to be godly men.

A man of character is a gift, and I believe character is what we often notice last about people, but is certainly more meaningful. Godly character is very attractive in a man.

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Looks or Character?
Posted : 16 Jul, 2012 07:56 AM

Looks or Character? Posted : Posted : 15 Jul, 2012 08:27 AM Since the same topic is going on the the Ask Guy category, I thought I do the same her and ask to the ladies of CDFF.

Ladies, what is the first few things you look for in us men?

a) Is it attractiveness first

b) Is it character first

c) A bit a both

d) Or something else

thanks

Jeff



Well Jeff I will say I am waiting for the man who exemplifies the truth through the way he lives his life and not what I read in his profile. Anyone can say they are Christian and very few including ladies are truely living the Christian life. My initial response is to my senses in that is he my definition of handsome, which includes clean appearance, brushed teeth, clothes appropriately fitted and well-mannered and respectful to others. Then the character of Christ will shine through irregardless of the clothes. Cleanliness is imperative upon a meeting, after that is his character, if Christ is present the next step is whether I want to be close to this person by attraction or am I to remain friends in Christ to glorify God.

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teach_ib

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Looks or Character?
Posted : 16 Jul, 2012 08:25 PM

Character...is he honest, a man of integrity, does he walk the walk or just talk the talk, is he responsible, is he too egotistical...for starters.

I have no preconceived idea of what he should look like, I try to look at the heart first...conversation (messages, e-mails, phone calls).

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thewanderer

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Looks or Character?
Posted : 16 Jul, 2012 09:54 PM

It's always been said that --- it takes LOOKS to find her, but it will always takes CHARACTER to keep her..



Physical attraction sure does has percentage on the connection or bonds both are creating, but it doesn't last long. The attraction from that emanating character and personality of God in a partner is what should be given the uttermost importance.

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Looks or Character?
Posted : 17 Jul, 2012 10:27 AM

Attractive to me is Character. Honest man walking with Jesus Christ every day not just on Sunday. Also Romantic and having a sense of humor is a Plus.

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Looks or Character?
Posted : 17 Jul, 2012 11:04 AM

Online, it's more difficult, and "looks" is a broad and vague thing, the phrase "beauty is in the eye of the beholder" is probably more true online than anywhere else.



It's the photo that attracts first, does his face say gentle and well mannered, distinguished, classy etc. (I know these are all worldly terms but they're well known)



I think if we're all honest, here online it's probably the photograph that draws attention, followed by what's said in the profile. BUT remember what I said at first, someone who is considered "drop dead gorgeous" to one, might not be to another. Just as an example I prefer the larger built guy (height and build - I'm 5'8 and cuddly and just have a personal preference that the guy should be taller and bigger - please don't think I'm too weird here!! :rolleyes: lol)



As well guys, please remember that alot of us "girls" are a bit apprehensive of making first contact.. so please don't think because we aren't making contact we aren't interested... :) (I know I'm VERY old fashioned like that... because I'm new to this and not used to it yet, I'd prefer to wait until a gentleman contacts me!! LOL)

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Apostelle

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Looks or Character?
Posted : 18 Jul, 2012 01:02 PM

Unfortunately, the physcial cues that suggest to a man that a woman may be interested are not present online. There is no "body language" in a static image. When I was on other sites I always responded to a wink/kiss, even if it was to say that I didnt think we would be a good match.

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Mercymay

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Looks or Character?
Posted : 18 Jul, 2012 11:16 PM

If one marry an ugly man/woman because of good character, what if character changes? One end up with both ugly and bad character, lol!



Seriously, I look for c � bit of both for first impression and know him more about his faith and the way he treat other people, conduct his life. It is easy to state I am a Christian but does he really lead a biblical Christian life ? There are agreeable character but are not romantic and sweet; there are financially secured but are not generous; good looking but is a magnet of others� attraction; Godly but judgmental of others; etc�in total I look for a bit of all those qualities that like one profile here states: one pretty face that will always keep the pretty smile on my face.

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PrincessofRedeemer

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Looks or Character?
Posted : 27 Jul, 2012 09:52 AM

:stop:After all I have been through in an abusive marriage to a Pastor for 15 years, the answer is character for me...



Beauty is in the eye of the Beholder and i pray to Behold the beauty of a Christ centered man and I for mutual attraction in the marriage I hope and pray for but it must first come from being spiritually compatable and for me that means that He love Jesus and the lost and lives like Jesus to the best he can, that he strives to be gentle, tender, a lover of the orphan, the widow, and the woman at the well, a lover of what is good and right and Holy.



A good Samaritan to all he meets. A man who has a heart for women who have been used and abused and thrown away, a man who feels that God's words that women are the weaker gender, means not that we are less in value but rather that we are precious gems to be protected and stood up for when men are out for sex or to be treated like cattle and dominated or to otherwise hurt them. I mean not just the woman he hopes to love, but he stands in his church as a brother who protects women and children and has no problem speaking to a man boldy and with courage to protect women and children whenever the moment arises in or out of his church body!!!!



This man,:hearts: the attractiveness of this man to me would be the equivelant of Matthew Mchauney, Nick Cage, and Will Smith all rolled into one. My marriage with this man would not only be full of love and tenderness but our intimate moments would be something even Hollywood couldnt replicate...LOL:ROFL::angel:

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Looks or Character?
Posted : 11 Aug, 2012 08:46 PM

Gosh, princessofredeemer, i simply cannot imagine being married to a PASTOR who was abusive! That is so terrible. Did he beat you? I feel your pain.



I would have to say that character of a man will have to reign over looks (but doesn't everybody want a hottie too?! lol)

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