I disagree with 2Sparrows' declarations. I say declaration because you do not say in your comments "In my opinion".
The other ladies have explained pretty well. I can't speak for the motive behind the profiles you read that have those phrases in them. For myself, I do want a man. Not just ANY man. If I wanted ANY man I could have been married many times over by this time. No, I want the man that God has for me. God made me that way. I think the Bible clearly shows that God made man and woman to be together. And so I seek, with God's leading and discernment, to find a man who can be the half to my whole, my help mate, my prayer warrior, my strength where I am weak. Until or unless I do find that man, I am continuing on as a single lady. I've been single for a long time, and God has always provided for me in the ways that a husband would. So, taken in that context, I don't NEED a man.
Godshandiwork: +1 to your response. You are one of the few people I've heard talk about our culture of independence and control. I agree. So many people think we are in control, when in fact we are not. People like to think they are responsible for where they end up because of their drive or ambition or motivation. Hogwash, I say, I think 95% of where someone is, is due to factors out of their control. Of course then when things start falling apart and they are "losing" control of a situation, the neurotic behaviors come out.
I also think people do need each other. I have never heard a physical voice from God so having a spouse to literaly talk to at night is needed. I have never physically seen God, so having a spouse to hug or get a hug from is needed. There are dimensions to ones life that a spouse is needed to fulfill.
Ok, I'll jump in and side with TwoSparrows to a degree and add some more flames. lol. I think I understand the spirit in which he is stating this.
I'll address it from a slightly different angle though. Society has changed. Todays society is one in which women have careers, it is no longer a situation in which women stayed at home and raise kids while the man was the sole bread winner. So most women today have a career and expect to provide their own income.
I have a neighbor who, being in her 30's and without a child, intentionally sought someone out, as in a business arrangment, to get her pregnant. He was only around till she got pregnant. So men any more are not needed to start a family. She can have her career and child to.
If someone wants some physical intimacy, well the local bar on a Friday night is just right down the corner. By secular society standards, a husband is no longer needed to meet certain needs.
I think, correct me if I am wrong TS, put the point is that certain thinks that what only a husband used to provide are very readily available without that husband in todays society.
The same can probably be said for men. What used to be "womens" skills are no longer. I feel fairly domesticated, I can cook or bake probably better than a lot of women, I can take care of my own laundry, I can even sew to a degree.
So if two people do get married, hey why not get divorced if things are not working out, why work at it, divorce is no longer taboo, you can always get remarried, you still have your career so you can take care of yourself, you can always go find intimacy for the night. So yeah, I think if things were viewed differently, divorice would be lower.
Sorry for the rabbit trail hijacking of the thread.
It sounds all and well until you try and tell me people should want what they don't need. There needs to be a balance. All you can do is follow your heart.
Once again we are arguing over the extreme end of terms.
What does Genesis say about being alone?
Genesis 2:18 (NASB)
18 Then the LORD God said, "It is not good for the man to be alone; I will make him a helper suitable for him."
Adam was in what many people like to say is in an ideal situation, just him and God. �If you have God, then you are never alone.� But, what does that verse say? It�s states that Adam IS alone, and that it is not good. So, in that sense, men and women need each other for support and companionship.
Then there are the extremes, where people put their lives on hold while they wait for a spouse, or the other extreme where people can treat their spouse like an object, they could care less if they are around or not.
When a woman says that she doesn�t need a man, that tends to send up red flags for many guys, since we need to be needed. We don�t want someone who needs us to do everything for them, but it is nice to have someone depend on you to do things for them.
Don't get too many red flags up if a woman says she doesn't "need" a man. It's difficult for a woman, who is in most cases still not supposed to come on too strongly and must wait for a man to approach her, to say she "needs" a man when one is not readily available and expressing strong interest. If there were a man interested in her, she would need him, but until then she may need to keep her distance from an emotional pitfall.
I'm not sure.It probably means the biological clock is not ticking urging them on to hurry and get married and have babies before their body no longer can.
Or they are not in urgent need of a marriage to stay in the
Back in "the good ol' days"...women needed men to protect them from...MEN!
God made us larger and stronger for that very reason...to protect and defend. We are not to "lord" this over them. In the 60's the creation of "the Pill" changed the dynamics of the male /female relationship and put women on a more equal footing. Economics also caused more women back into the workforce.
Suddenly men were competing directly with women and because women were now able to "plan" their pregnancy they became even more of a "threat" to some men.
The operative word here is NEED! Women do not need men.
Lol...Whew, just takes alittle hot sauce :toomuch: to make the worms crawl out.
Here are two of my personal favorites! :
livesInCanada:
"From other posts I have read from you I get the impression you are some what sexist. This is too bad as you do not need to feel fear and hatred towards women because they do not need you the way you wish."
Archimedes:
"That you are really saying (and I deduce this from reading many of your posts and threads and from your personal emails to me) is: �If men were allowed to �Control� women the way they �used� to --then the divorce rate would reflect only how unhappy these men are with their Servants (wives) and that children would have their Dictators (fathers)."
If you two hugely intelligent people would consider my profile then ponder the type of women I am around......are you pondering?......ok time's up. I am around women that can and do work side by side with men. They are strong tough capable confident women without chips on
their shoulders. They could keep up with you Arcbimedes, and livesinCanada my little suburbanite, ...well I just gotta laugh. I have a feeling you would be like Pairs Hilton when she was asked to shovel horse manure, .......although judging from your post... you are pretty good at the manure part!
Archimedes, you have repeatly referenced private mail I sent you. I already told you post them. They are about the Catholic church and my testimony ......why don't you shared that you got all upset and banned me from mailing you? It was only one reply per mail received, and you banned me?...lol!
All it takes to see what is really inside a person is to push the envelope a bit. This can be see by contrasting Archimedes's and Canada's responses with Handiwork's and Shawn's.. and even Godslamb who said she disagreed and did so graciously.
