Thread: Would you date a hard of hearing/deaf guy...?
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Would you date a hard of hearing/deaf guy...?
Posted : 26 Nov, 2010 05:14 PM
I've asked some girls out, and they've turned me down. The more I've been turned down, the more I seem to always assume that they're afraid of that kind of challenge and they don't bother to find out what it's like to date me. Is dating a 'deaf' guy that scary or crazy?
Thanks for sharing how your hearts and spirits feel about what I asked? I treasure your personal opinions!!!
It's true that it is a personal decision what to share, how much/how soon ... my problem at the moment is that I've had my hopes up a lot lately, online and offline, only to have them "deferred" to looking for someone else ... and I guess I'm feelin' pretty sensitive in my heart and spirit to rejection right now when it's because of something I have no control over, like my physical challenges and not being able to drive for financial reasons ... so I'd rather not find out later from sharing about this that THAT'S the "deal-breaker" for a gal who would otherwise accept me as someonne she wants to get to know better as someone who MIGHT be "that special guy" from God she's been dreaming of and looking for to become "more than friends" with, to become her "husband in her heart" and her husband in every way before God and witnesses.
I've gone the route of leaving details out of my profile in the past and even not even mentioning that I was physically-challenged until later on in the e-mail process ... like when I was on eHarmony for a year ... but sooner or later, when these factors were shared, they were the "deal-breaker" for most of those gals who were initially interested in me that were really attractive to me in various ways in our similarilties ... of course, some other gals had "deal-breakers" of their own that came to light for ME to realize we weren't "a good match" for each other beecause of THEM (like some of those gals were being deceptive in various ways about themselves, I eventually found out) ... so .... that was all hard to experience, spending all that time getting some hope in your heart, then finding yourself being rejected over and over again when the gals learned you were physically-challenged, no matter whether or not you shared how God brought cha through it all and there were positive blessings in your life as a physically-challenged man of God, godslamb and Sue.
So ... this is why I've been feeling that on this new effort to look for "that special barefoot gal" of my heart, dreams, hopes and prayers that I should be as much "up front" and share only the amount of details I have in my profile about these factors ... because I hope that knowing at least THAT much now willl weed out the gals who would later get my hopes up only to break my heart again when they found out later about these things beyond my control but are a "deal-breaker" for them anyway ,,. it hasn't worked that well so far, I've found, but ... still ... what can ya do? Rejection is rejection, for whatever reason, isn't it? And it HURTS!!! ALWAYS!!!
Well ... guess that's all there is to share about this need my heart and spirit have at the moment ... about my sensitive "romantic barefoot guy heart's" predictiment ... again, thanks for sharing YOUR hearts' feelings and your opinions with me, godslamb and Sue!!! :hearts::hearts::hearts:
Love in my heart as your brother in Christ to ya both,
Let's face it, rejection is rejection and you are right, it doesn't feel so good. Even though my physical handicap is 'healed' I still get rejected...over and over and over and over and over again...lol But this is how I look at it. If God has someone special for me (and I believe He does), it will happen in His timing whether I have a disclaimer in a profile or not. I take rejection with a grain of salt. Not interested in me? I'm fine with that because I'm still focused on doing what God has for me in my life. Once God shows me that my purpose is to be a friend/girlfriend/wife, then I will change my direction. No what I mean? Don't let it get you down. For me I just enjoy being single (I mean really, there is an up side if you look for it...take Paul for example). Once God moves my life in the direction of a relationship, I'll be ready. Hope that made sense. lol God bless you brother.
I sign. I'm not licensed, and could probably only license at level 2 right now, but if the man were patient I wouldn't mind dating someone who was deaf/hard of hearing at all. I think signing would add a certain depth to a relationship, because signing can be expressive in a different way than the written or spoken word.
I would have no problem with dating a deaf or hard of hearing guy. Growing up I was unable to speak correctly in order to be understood by people. They diagnosed me with a speach impediment but now hearing gets muffled in one of my ears at times. It comes and goes. It doesnt effect me unless there is lots of different people talking or if i am riding a horse quickly. In highschool i felt it was important to learn sign language and one day hope to foster deaf kids. If i found the right guy who just happened to be deaf then it wouldnt be a problem. I hate it when people just turn others away before letting them get to know them.
To be honest, I don't see why that would be much of a turn off, no, probably not easy but other then it being a learning experiance, I just don't see the issue. I think distance would probably be a harder issue.
