We all know what's the correct course of action for a christian.
That being said, it's so much easier for a woman than for a man.
Also, once you get to a point, you automatically will feel physically attracted to each other, and have urges.
I'm not here to listen to someone lecturing me bible, or what in their mind is the correct way of action...
I'm talking about real life. Men and women all over the world get this physical attraction for each other, that's like a magnet, once they are in motion towards each other, they accelerate at an enormous rapid rate until they clash and stick together.
And so I'd like to discuss, not the coolheaded situation where we all have control over, but the moments where we feel like we've met the right person, we're getting engaged, we're at the point where we trust each other, love each other, butterflies in the stomach, and physical attraction is there!
Those who've never been married before, or who are virgins may not understand what I'm talking about.
I'm talking about the weeks before marriage.
And once a man has experienced it, it's so difficult to go back to abstinence.
So all of this, to ask our ladies in the forums, those who have enjoyed sharing their complete selves with that other person,
How do you feel when you've been given a second chance, and have the chance to do it all over again?
You are sure, deep in your heart that this next person is going to be the one where you will be spending at least many years of your life with. Things have just been right.
God blessed it, you love him, he loves you, you've been faithful through the 4 seasons, and there's this connection, this attraction, this desire for physical intimacy.
And the question is, what if you knew that for reasons (financial, family wise, career or study wise, or other), you know you won't be able to marry for at least 4 months, but you also know you won't be able to wait?
I don't know about ladies, but us men are more urgent in this matter...
Serious questions about scripture are always appreciated here. Let's start with 1Cor. 7:2 where sex before marriage is equated with sexual immorality. Therefore we apply verses that speak to sexual immorality and Old Testament verses. May you find blessings in your reading.
The Bible says sex 'outside of marriage' is sexual immorality. Period. It is clear, and says this in many places throughout the Bible.
Marriage is the first institution God created, in Genesis 2:18-25.
To assume being engaged is just as good as being married is a mistake many have fallen for, and given their virginity for--only to have the relationship end before the marriage vows were spoken.
For a man to pressure the woman he claims to love to participate in sex before marrying her, is to dishonor her. That does not sound like love to me.
God created sex to be a sacred expression of true love between a married man and woman. It's a precious gift that should not be devalued as some form of recreation, regardless of how this unGodly world portrays it.
"Dear friends, I urge you, as aliens and strangers in the world, to abstain from sinful desires, which war against your soul. Live such good lives among the pagans that, though they accuse you of doing wrong, they may see your good deeds and glorify God on the day He visits us."--1 Peter 2:11-12.
So, Testing, you have to ask yourself: Do you want to be of this world and it's sinful ways, or do you want to be of God?
I'm sure you know committing to living for our Lord is very difficult and takes a great deal of internal fortitude (also called integrity or character), but if you want to call yourself "Christian" and MEAN it, then you have to 'walk the walk,' not just 'talk the talk.'
Asking God for His Strength and Help when we are weak does help us resist sin, if we trust in Him, and remember He always gives us a way out so we don't HAVE to sin.
I hope I've given you some perspective on this matter, and pray God opens your eyes to understanding of His Word when you do decide to read it.
It's not only guys who pressure anymore. Set boundaries. Any person who won't respect your boundaries before marriage, will not respect boundaries within marriage.
"That being said, it's so much easier for a woman than for a man."
No, it is not. I have no idea where men get this information from. That is so far from the truth. Completely, completely inaccurate.
I abstain because God commands me to do so. I have made the mistake in the past and it leads down a long trail to unhappiness. I choose to wait for the man God has for me and if he is the man God has sent, he will be willing to wait as well.
The simple answer is you just don't do it. It gets easier with time and discipline.
