Author	Thread: single father weird situation need suggestions BAD
Rhs32 View Profile History	single father weird situation need suggestions BAD Posted : 15 Jun, 2012 06:23 PM Ok I have a daughter that I love and would do anything in the world for of course. However she is midway through primary school and misses her family being together of course. me and mother split 2 yrs ago. We were never married and we are def not good for each other and will not be getting back together so problem is me and her mother were together since she was 3 months pregnant with her. Yes not biologically my daughter :( she doesnt know her real dad so I am still allowed to see her on a regular schedule and help pay for things but never adopted her. So I have no rights. AND I get reminded of that all the time by numerous acts. I would never bad mouth mother to daughter and dont wanna play games that will make it confusing for my daughter but I can only be a doormat to the situation for so long before i get upset. If i dont do as told I will be pulled out of her life it has happened before. my daughters worth it of course so i dont mind however I have no say in anything. How can I try to get her mother to help work WITH me with our daughter and not against me. Post Reply
View Profile History	single father weird situation need suggestions BAD Posted : 16 Jun, 2012 10:31 AM That is wonderful that you love and care for your daughter. many biological dad's do not even take care or love their own child. Tell the mother you love and want to adopt her so she will be yours legally. If the mother says no, just pray about it all. Maybe this is not what the Lord's will is for you. You maybe one day marry and have lots of Children. I know they would not take the place of your now daughter, but at this point only her mother has the custody of her and can control the situation. :angel: Post Reply
GraceAndKindness View Profile History	single father weird situation need suggestions BAD Posted : 16 Jun, 2012 11:25 AM Wow, I'd suggest praying bout it (guess you do), seeking God's favor over the situation. No matter what it looks like, God is every second in Control. Maybe you have friends who would commit to praying and standing with you about this. First and foremost, if you haven't; seek God about it. You're talking about loving an caring for your daughter, and from what you say, you are her father. Could be wrong, but sounds honorable to me. Post Reply
View Profile History	single father weird situation need suggestions BAD Posted : 16 Jun, 2012 11:26 AM If he and the mother aren't together, it seems like adoption would not be the best choice. That could be a disaster. Post Reply
View Profile History	single father weird situation need suggestions BAD Posted : 16 Jun, 2012 11:29 AM With that said... This is a tricky (to put it mildly) situation. It sounds like the mother is using your relationship with your daughter to manipulate you into giving her (mother) her way? But no matter what you do, she can come back and prove you aren't biologically her father, so you wouldn't have any grounds for custody (obviously emotionally and because you care about her, but legally, I mean). Honestly, if I were you I'd talk to a lawyer. It isn't right that the mother can blackmail you with your relationship with your daughter, and the situation seems so convoluted that you need the advice of someone who would know the paths available to you. Post Reply
GraceAndKindness View Profile History	single father weird situation need suggestions BAD Posted : 16 Jun, 2012 11:37 AM Almost forgot: :applause: Happy Father's Day :applause: Post Reply
View Profile History	single father weird situation need suggestions BAD Posted : 16 Jun, 2012 11:56 AM The only advice I can give you. Is pray for the mother. Try your best not to fight with her, and just keep praying for her. My ex husband is DRAMA with a capital D. He loves to argue and if he's not mad at me, he's trying to flirt with me. So most of the time I don't talk to him. Ever. Unless it has to do with our daughter. I've tried to keep him away from her, because he is nuts. But it only ended up hurting my daughter more. Whatever decision momma makes, she will have to live with it. If your daughter is real close to you, then the mom is going to have to deal with alot of heartbreak from the daughter, if she tries to stop yall from seeing each other. Whatever you do, do not let momma know that she's hurting you. It may just be a sick game. If she knows this gets to you, then she might do it more. But if you act like it doesn't bother you she may give up. Being a single parent is very hard. Good luck. Post Reply
Rhs32 View Profile History	single father weird situation need suggestions BAD Posted : 16 Jun, 2012 02:42 PM thank you all very much I have prayed and still do on a regular basis for her, ive talked to attorneys there is nothing i can do period. except be happy lol that she lets me see her. thanks for all replys Post Reply
clynn5683 View Profile History	single father weird situation need suggestions BAD Posted : 17 Jun, 2012 01:48 PM This is a heartbreaking situation. Legally and biologically you are not your daughters father. From what I read, your ex allows you access to her daughter when it is convenient and beneficial for her. As I see it, you have 3 options: 1. Continue as is, allowing your ex to take when she needs it, leaving you at her mercy to allow you in her daughters life only when she sees fit to. 2. You can sit down with your ex, come to a mutual agreement on what your role is in her daughters life, agreeing on visitation and financial support. 3. Walk away broken hearted. #1 does not seem like a health option. #2 is impossible to legally enforce and #3 is heartbreaking. If your ex has her daughter's best interest at heart then she will agree to #2 but it seems like she isn't thinking about her daughters needs. At the end of the day, you have absolutely no legal rights to her daughter. Post Reply
hubbarddebra99 View Profile History	single father weird situation need suggestions BAD Posted : 19 Jun, 2012 04:59 PM don't just pray, pray AND talk to a family law lawyer! seeing how daughter does not know her biological father, and you cared for her before birth, you MIGHT have more rights than you know! Do It Now! Praying for you! Post Reply
Rhs32 View Profile History	single father weird situation need suggestions BAD Posted : 20 Jun, 2012 04:31 PM thanks for the lawyer suggestion. Unfortunately I did 4 years ago and it doesn't matter. Post Reply

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